Before I came out to my friends and family in high school, I seriously considered transitioning to a man. I’ve always been a “tomboy” who felt better in baggy clothes and suits instead of tight skirts and dresses, so I figured it would just be easier. As I got older, and with the support of my family and friends, I realized I wasn’t considering transitioning because I wanted to be a man, but because it would make it easier for the rest of the world to understand and relate to me. So after giving everyone with beef about my sexuality and gender the finger, I became increasingly comfortable with and in my body, and here I am today as the proud authentic lesbian. However, while exploring my transitioning options I developed a fascinating curiosity with trans men that has stuck with me ever since. When The Squirting Man from Kennston Productions hit my desk for encoding, I literally ran to my editor-in-chief asking if I could review it. Being the awesome, amazing, wonderful person she is, she said yes and here we are.
Scene 1 – Eddie Wood
Eddie Wood, our leading man throughout this flick, is one handsome dude, and this scene is the perfect opener. He’s outside up against a fence and gets right to it by fingering and jerking himself off. The fire truck along with other random outside noise really enhances the fantasy and captures the whole sex in public theme. To top it all off, Eddie squirts a fucking river and the whole thing is insanely intense, proving the title more than fitting. Because it’s a solo scene there isn’t much more to it than that, but watch the clip below and tell me that doesn’t look like a hell of a good time! Eddie looks pretty exhausted and satisfied by the end of it all.
Scene 2 – Eddie Wood & Parker Reed
This scene is a lot of fun. Eddie and Parker Reed are playing a video game, and after Parker wins, it becomes evident exactly what is at stake. The boys decided that whoever lost would have to suck the other one off and, being a man of his word, Eddie stays true to his promise. I found the dialogue in this one particularly humorous and ironic as it’s filled with “no homos” and too many “bros” to count. I love when a porno makes me laugh so this was right up my alley. Parker is already hard when Eddie pulls his shorts down, and besides a weird audio glitch, the sucking off is pretty great. Eddie talks throughout the ordeal, showing how funny he really is (at least in my opinion) and you can tell both guys are completely into the scene. Eddie takes pride is making Parker squirm and moan and Parker just loves being sucked off, as I would imagine most people do. My favorite part of this scene is the strap-on fucking. Eddie fucks Parker with a purpose and watching both of them cum as a result was hot. I especially love the camera’s front facing perspective while they fuck doggy style. Something about seeing facial expressions but no body parts really turned me on. After they get it in missionary, the boys proceed to jerk each other off. Eddie cums 4 times by my count, and even though it takes Parker a little longer to bust his nut, when he does it’s incredibly sexy. He cums quietly, but he worked hard for that nut, and by the look on Eddie’s face it turned him on too. At the end, Parker says he won, to which Eddie replies “Can we say we both won?” Parker’s response is brilliant. He looks over at Eddie and says, “I guess. It’s all about equality right?”
Scene 3 – Eddie Wood
Eddie is in the shower for this scene and I didn’t find anything particularly special about it. It could be because the first solo scene was so fantastic that I compared the two, or maybe it’s because such a great scene preceded it, but either way this one didn’t do anything for me. I did enjoy taking this time to check out Eddie’s body, how he masturbates, and what turns him on, but sexually I took it as a well-placed, much needed intermission.
Scene 4 – Eddie Wood & Veronica Moore
Call me your typical lesbian perpetuating the stereotypes, but the first thing I noticed was Veronica Moore’s amazing boobs! (I love boobs! BOOBS!) Eddie was very appreciative also because he spends a lot of time with these babies, and for me that was perfect. I also couldn’t help but focus on her “Boss” necklace which fit her personality perfectly as the scene went on. The chemistry between these two makes this my favorite scene. My absolute favorite part comes after Veronica fucks Eddie missionary, when the two find themselves having a conversation about how quickly Eddie cums from excitement and how much easier it is to tell if a man cums versus a woman. It wasn’t the content of the conversation that I enjoyed as much as how comfortable these two were in their bodies while discussing it and throughout the scene for that matter. Nothing enhances a fantasy like knowing the performers actually like each other and are really getting each other off. Veronica continues to fuck the shit out of Eddie and at one point tells him to take it like a man, which was a major turn on for both of us! You can tell she’s taking pride in making him squirt because she just won’t let up. Every time you think he can’t take anymore she pulls another one out of him. She even has him sit on her face, which got both of them extremely hot, while she masturbates. We don’t get to see Veronica cum, but by the end of the scene I completely lost count of how many orgasms Eddie had. Nap time anyone?
Scene 5 – Eddie Wood & Tasha Jones
This plot almost had me on the floor dying from laughter. Eddie is in the bathroom while his sleeping girlfriend is just down the hall and Tasha Jones is standing directly outside of the door. Breasts only covered with suspender straps, it’s clear Tasha is a woman on a mission. As soon as Eddie walks out of the bathroom, you can tell he just lost the battle. The poor guy doesn’t stand a chance and it’s awesome! Even as he pleads with her to stop and tries to convince her that they shouldn’t be doing what they both have every intention of doing, you can tell he wants her, and you can’t blame the guy. Not only is Ms. Jones sexy, she’s already half naked and standing directly in his face, touching and kissing all over him while he tries to think of his girl, but steadily walks towards Tasha’s room. The constant “Yes, I want to, but no, we shouldn’t” got my fantasy juices flowing and made the buildup amazing. When she finally gets him on her bed, she takes his clothes off and immediately starts jerking him off. She takes it up a notch with some fingering before sucking him off and giving some of the best head that I’ve seen on film this year! He squirts all over the place, as we’ve come to expect and love, and that’s pretty much that. It leaves a little to be desired, but it didn’t feel incomplete.
Overall I really like this movie and definitely think it’s worth checking out. The cameraman’s constant heavy breathing in the 4th scene was super annoying, but because Eddie and Veronica are so great together they make up for it, and you can kinda understand it if you put yourself in that room watching those two. I probably would have jumped in the scene! Other than that you won’t find anything to complain about, so go check out Kennston Productions The Squirting Man and let me know what you think.