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spoofs
Written by: J.D. on March 6th, 2008
 When it comes to porn spoofs, you never know what you’re going to get. Sometimes they are a brilliant parody of the original… and other times you get a bizarre wannabe that totally flatlines. This Scissorhands redo was a little of both for me – creepy with a completely camp sensibility that fuels my perverted humor. While I can’t say that I wasn’t totally fascinated by watching Eddie simultaneously finger/fist/dick fuck the neighborhood biddies, one on each arm, I can say that I was a little more than freaked out by Eddie squirting gallons of cum from his “hands.” And, of course, I get caught up in the logistics of it all – like, does he pee from his penishands? Are they desensitized by everyday use? This list goes on and on. While we may never know those answers, we luckily get a glimpse into the masturbation habits of the penishanded with an all out jerk-off fest in scene five. All in all, this is a delightfully weird spoof that is sure to leave you a little repulsed, a little intrigued and definitely glad you make the decision to watch. Two penis thumbs up.
-J.D. Bauchery
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 There are at least a million Star Trek porn spoofs, but I have officially found the best one ever! XXX Trek features all of the staples of good Trekkie porn – funny story line, intergalactic booty calls, and a befuddled Spock character. What makes this one so great (besides featuring Randy Spears as Captain Qwirk) is that it has been digitally altered, so it looks like an animated comic book! After the ship is sucked into a giant vagina our crew has encountered in space, the men struggle to save themselves. It’s a battle they appear to have little chance of winning as, “The vagina appears to have the power to control our minds.” In the end, Mr. Sperm (Spock) saves the day by explaining the nature of human men to the creature, who decides to return to the lesbian part of the galaxy! This movie is a lot of fun with plenty of great sex thrown in for those of you who are into that sort of thing. I suggest the first scene, but that’s just because I’m in love with Randy Spears and would probably enjoy watching him fuck his pillow.
-The Porn Librarian
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Here’s the story, of a dirty lady, who was psyched to tell you about a new porn. That’s right, today I’m reviewing Not The Bradys XXX, a hilarious spoof of the classic family comedy. It seems that hard times have fallen on the Brady family, and in an effort to help, Marcia answers an ad for a “figure model.” Of course, the ad is for porn, but the Brady girls are always willing to take one for the team. The best thing about this is that they manage to capture the campiness of the original television show AND pair some of today’s hottest adult stars in incredibly hot scenes. My favorite was the first between Jasmine Byrne and Mikey Butders, but I did really enjoy watching Jan on all fours getting it from Tee Real. With a great cast, amazingly cheesy sets, and some of your favorite 70’s characters getting’ busy, there’s really no reason I can think of for you not to see this movie!
-The Porn Librarian
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Sometimes there’s nothing better than a GOOD porn spoof, but they are few and far between. A lot of pornos spoof on a title or character in an effort to get a little attention, but there are only a handful of great adult movies each year that manage to combine plot with incredible sex and pay homage to a classic. Lady Scarface is one of those movies. Director Daniel Dakota got it right with this raunchy remake of the Pacino classic that features the gorgeous Carmen Luvana as the Tony Montana character. My favorite scene features Luvana & Ava Rose – they’ve worked together before and I can’t get enough of them. Luvana straps on and fucks Rose after a long day working at the car wash. Overall, the plot is entertaining, the sex is smoking (Tommy Gunn deserves a shout out for his scene with Rose), and the film ends with Luvana emptying out her machine gun and while yelling “Say hello to my little friend.” Classic.
The Porn Librarian
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Written by: J.D. on December 6th, 2007
 “A good fuck is like a dance – serious, yet playful; ready for whatever may come.” Yes, that’s a direct quote from the movie, and yes, it should have been enough to stop you from reading this and click to watch it yourself. But if you still need convincing, here we go. On the nomination list for Best Sex Comedy, this action-packed parody takes the violence and thrill of Tarantino’s original and mixes it with (sometimes unintentionally) hilarious one-liners and hot hardcore XXX. Scene four is what did me in. Shot from below, a pair of tight-bodied kidnappers get busy on a staircase. And while sex on a stairs never seems like a good idea to me, they not only make it incredibly steamy, this sexy schoolgirl/muscle man duo make it look really easy. Ah, the magic of porn. To sum it all up: Sure the acting is what you’d expect, but really, any movie that features a harnessing of sexual energy called ‘The Exploding Orgasm Technique’ is ok in my book. Although, I think next time maybe I’d lose the gong.
-J.D. Bauchery
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Recruit! Recruit! Recruit! My liking this movie proves once and for all that feminists (at least this one) do have a sense of humor. This 70’s spoof of the Women’s Lib movement is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while. It’ll take you behind the scenes at Ms. Bull’s training camp for the future carpet munchers of America. This is a world where men are seen as the enemy and you can see every stereotype ever perpetuated about feminists lived out! From my research, I learned that this was originally a pretty softcore film, but hardcore scenes were spliced in much to the approval of male chauvinist pigs and dirty dykes like me! There are also a lot of notable women in this film like Uschi Digart, Candy Samples, and one of few black stars of sexploitation, Debbie McGuire. I’ll probably never say this again, but I think the plot and dialogue are the highlights of this movie! However, you should definitely check out the steamy scene between Digart and Roxanne Brewer. There’s also a hot solo masturbation scene with a Dr. Pepper bottle, talk about product placement!
Yours in Solidarity,
The Porn Librarian
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 I’ve probably watched the movie Bring It On twenty times. I’m not bragging, but that might help you understand how excited I was when I found this spoof. Unfortunately for me, the cover and some pom-pom’s was as far as they went in trying to spoof a fantastic movie. The good news is that what follows is 17 minutes of hot girl on girl action that help explains why Danni Ashe is one of the internet’s greatest success stories. In this quickie, after Sarah Blake and Sammie Rhodes figure out that they don’t have cheerleading practice, they decide to practice kissing each other in preparation for Sarah’s big date with the captain of the football squad. I miss the days when my hot friends felt inexperienced enough to practice making out with me. Anyways, things quickly escalate from there as Sammie slips her fingers inside of Sarah. Soon, they move on to a pink rabbit and Sarah is writhing in ecstasy before long. Things continue on from there, but I don’t like to ruin all the good stuff! However, I can say I anticipate Sarah’s date might be a little disappointing after this afternoon practice session.
-The Porn Librarian
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This movie, if nothing else, is jam-packed with sex. I mean, I know you’d expect a ton of sex in an adult film, but seriously, this is non-stop sex. Even when they’re furthering the plot line, you can bet there will be some cocks here, a little pussy there. The production value of this film is very high. Aside from all the nudity and fucking, it would be easy to confuse this with a mainstream film about Arthur and Uther Pendragon. The sets and the costumes are stunning, and there are more than four hours of sex, sex and more sex. While I’m not quite into the “traditional” female roles, some of the hairstyles are ridiculously awesome, and there is an all-female scene that involves those beautiful glass dildos. Soooo jealous! This film may not be up everyone’s alley, but for those who enjoy beautiful blondes, orgies, and plot lines that involve men in armor, this is the movie for you!
-Essin’ Em
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Star Trek gone porno. That is the best summation I can give for this film. Randy Spears is the captain in one of his earlier films (he has a curly mullet, if that says anything), and he proves that he can eat pussy and conquer Uranus just as well then as he can today. The rest of the crew, including Dr. Sperm and Semen Bob, all have fun and interesting characters, and take some time to actually develop them before all the clothing comes flying off. This is by far the best spoof of Star Trek I’ve seen (and there are a lot of them). Best part of the film; the horrendously amazing 80′s clothing worn to the surface. This movie is a ton of fun, good for watching as a couple or in a group, and not only for Trekkies – it’s for everyone!
-Essin’ Em
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Written by: admin on March 8th, 2007
 Ok, a spoof of Pulp Fiction. You CANNOT get any better than that…until you add in Ava Rose and Marie Luv, two of my favorite adult actresses. “Pulp Friction” is an outstanding spoof that mixes awesome sex scenes with pretty good acting that makes you glad to have found this gem. I particularly like the scene in which Ava pretends to be poisoned by a sex drug in order to have all kinds of hot sex…and then admits to it like the coy young lady she is. I love the expression on the guys faces when they realize they might get taken from behind by a buxom blonde with a daunting dildo. Another great plus to this movie is the bonus features; there is an extra bonus sex scene, and my favorite is the “behind the scenes,” which is basically porno bloopers, from them forgetting their lines, calling each other by their real names, to an accidental shooting of cum into Ava’s eye. They really help you get to know the actors and actresses as people; kind of like access Hollywood but for the adult industry.
-Essin’ Em
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