• Take responsibility for your life. 
• Get tested regularly.
  
• Practice safer sex always. 
• Show solidarity with those living with the disease. 

AVERT.org has a lot of great information about the many aspects of HIV and AIDs.  Get familiar with it.  All of it.  If you’re not sure where to start, we think finding out about how you can get HIV will get you moving in the right direction.

We love sex and all things pleasure based, but safety always comes first.  Give your body and those around you the respect that is deserved.

Love,

Ginger and J.D.

I know, I know, getting’ busy in the great outdoors sounds like a fabulous idea.  And yes, in theory it is an awesome idea, but in practice there are some major logistical obstacles to navigate.  It may seem like I am being a Debby Downer, but try to think of me more as a Realistic Rhonda that wants to give you all the info before you end up with bug bites the size of silver dollars all over your bare bottom.

Luckily in the last few years we at HM4Her have written up some super helpful tips for getting through the summer with as few causalities as possible.  Check out our sage advice from summers past.

The Motion of the Ocean

Sex and water are one hot duo. Not only do you get that thrill of exhibitionism if you are in a public place (though try to keep it out of kid heavy areas, oh and um… it’s kinda illegal), you get to try out all sorts of new and exciting positions while you float nearly weightlessly through the water. Not too mention easy access through bikini bottoms and pulling the trunks down a bit! Tee Hee!

There is a little snafu though. It’s not the water that’s the problem, it’s what’s IN the water that makes for a questionable situation. Water than contains chlorine, salt, or bacteria can all pose risk of infection or irritation when it’s forced into the vagina during penetration and thrusting. That basically means all pools, lakes, oceans, rivers and Jacuzzis can mean risky business for getting down and dirty… um, literally.




Fun In The Sun

What are the two biggest things to remember when you’re doing strenuous activity in the hot summer sun? Stay hydrated and use plenty of sun block! Well, the same goes for getting busy on a sunshiney day. Make sure you have water on hand to keep the dehydration away and definitely go head to toe with the SPF! You really don’t want to have to explain to people why your ass is so sunburned you can’t sit down. Why not make the application part of the fun and rub each other down? It’s all about the protection, people. And let’s not forget about the bug spray…



My Name is Sandy… Sandy Vagina

Now, unless you go all out and super prepare for having sex on the beach, my two cents on the matter says don’t even bother. Sure it looks all romantic and swoony in the movies, but the cold, gritty reality is that sex on the beach means little grainy sand particles up in all your cervices. And I know I want nothing to do with that. The best way I’ve heard to combat the sandy dilemma is to go with a zippered sleeping bag. While it makes sense that most sand would stay out, I still see a few granules creeping in, so I’m a little hesitant. But for braver souls than I, definitely grab your camping gear out of the closet and hit the beach running.

Also, you are in public, no matter how secluded you think you are. If you’re planning to have sex on the sand, wear a dress and keep it on while you get it on. It’s way easier than having to scramble back into your sandy clothes if someone – particularly a cop – should wander your way.



Notes From Camp (by former HM4Her’er Essin’ Em)

First of all, may I please recommend you invest in a cheap air mattress. It doesn’t have to be fancy, even inflatable rafts will do. You’ll be very thankful I suggested this. No, really. The ground is HARD and air mattresses are also good for sleeping, as well as a sex-ing, so I give them a thumbs up.

As far as sleeping bags go, I thought I was pretty ingenious…I bought two cheap single sleeping bags and zipped them together to create a queen sized sleeping bag for the two of us to share. It was ideal both for sex and for cuddling without losing body heat to the cold outdoors. They make special “couples” sleeping bags, too. You can use your own personal bags as well — just think about how cold it’ll be at 11pm when you’re naked in the middle of the wilderness. Something to consider.

I’m speaking mostly about tent sex because I wasn’t ready to let spiders, ticks, or other creepy crawlies get anywhere near my vagina, and because I like to keep my vulva mosquito bite free. However, if you’re into to outdoor-outdoor sex, make sure you sprits on some bug spray (and perhaps sun block, depending on your timing) before you go at it, to protect yourself and your partner.




And Now For Some Brilliant Ideas!

- Ooooh, no air conditioning, huh? Not to worry, you can still fuck, though you’re slowly melting to death. Point a few fans on the bed and hop into the shower together on cold blast. Get started with a little hot foreplay in the freezing stream, then run back to the bed while you’re still shivering a little to get the full potential of the air from the fans hitting your dripping skin to keep it cold. Fuck. Rinse. Repeat.

- Or go straight to the source and fill a bowl with ice cubes. Run the little squares of delicious freezing over each other’s skin and enjoy the frigid thrill while you get decidedly unfrigid.

For more sexy summertime advice, take a look at our older posts!

xoxo
-JD

AIM Rules!

(via  Jiz Lee’s Blog )

xoxo
-J.D.

Happy Humpday!  Welcome back to the mid-week stretch.  And welcome to March – the month that goes in lion and out like a lamb.  It’s the month that officially brings us into the spring season, and I could not be happier.  There’s nothing I love more than spring… well, watching folks fuck on screen isn’t too shabby either, but spring means I can watch people fucking on screen with the windows open!  Anyway, that and the fact that it’s Humpday has put be in a fabulous mood and has me giddy and searching through the interwebs with vigor!  Good thing you get the fruits of my labor!  So sit back, relax and let’s get to it with a little link love!

- XKCD always seems to get it right, especially when they talk about sex.

- Speaking of things that are geeky awesome – Playing D & D With Porn Stars.  That’s right, Dungeons and Dragons…  Holy crap, does it get any nerdier/sexier?!  I think not.  (via Fleshbot)

- Fabulous San Francisco-based queer porn empire Pink and White Productions has recently published their safer sex best practices in porn standards, complete with health resources.  Healthy safe sex = Awesomeness.  Thanks Pink and White!  (via Tiny Nibbles)

- Queer porn star Jiz Lee is all about giving back to the community and is hoping that we will help out too – with a special porno incentive to make it super extra worth your while!  We <3 Jiz!

- Finally!  A study that tells porn like it is – that it’s not harmful and yes, it can even be beneficial!

- While this doesn’t have to do with sex/porn directly, The Bloggess is awesome and we think everyone deserves one of her awards.  Scroll to the bottom and choose away!

- As this link states boldly on top – Warning: This Article Contains Video Of Ron Jeremy Rapping. Woah.  that’s right, it’s porn stars and pop songs from Nerve!

- While no one really cares about Olympics news once the games are finished up, this sorry excuse for not winning a gold just came out and I just had to post it.  WTF? Is there even such a thing as too much porn?  And if there was, can you imagine blaming your 2nd place standing for it?  Norwega is craying.

And lastly, two videos that bring our Olympic coverage to a total halt.

The first, a commercial that ran exclusively in Canada during the games.  Apparently other countries (namely the one I am typing this from) wouldn’t be able to handle all the hot girl on hot girl action.  FAIL to them, this commercial is awesome.

And second. Two Australian news anchors had so much fun Wii curling on air, they did not even notice how hilariously awkward it was for us viewers.  Ratings up!

Happy Humpday.  How this gets you through to the weekend.

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

I am so happy right now I could burst! You know Gardisil, the vaccine that helps prevent four known types of virus that lead to HPV? Well according to Consumer Reports, it’s finally been approved for male use! Oh, and this morning I found out a new vaccine has been approved for female use too!

According to U.S. News, Cervarix has been approved for women 10-25. Cervarix doesn’t protect against the two strains of HPV that cause genital warts that Gardisil does, but it does protect against one more strain of HPV that leads to possibly cancerous lesions on the cervix than Gardisil does.

Why am I giddy with joy? Well, because HPV can cause warts (unsightly) and cancer (potentially life threatening), and women can only really be tested for it after it enters a ‘visible’ state (abnormal pap smears and warts) but HPV doesn’t always have visible symptoms in men and there’s no approved male test. So, just like back when unwanted pregnancies were just the woman’s problem, so was finding, treating and dealing with the potentially life threatening fallout from HPV. Really fair, huh?

Statisitically, something between 50% and 75% of all sexually active people supposedly have or will have HPV in their lifetime. In fact, HPV can sit in one’s system without being detected for years before anyone notices something weird on a pap smear, and can therefore be transmitted without even knowing they have it. Oh, and did I mention that condoms aren’t full protection against HPV, which can be spread by contact with the area around the genitals that isn’t covered by a condom?

So basically ladies, all those ‘safer’ sex options like asking your male partner if they’d been tested recently for everything and using a condom? How about waiting for monogamy with a particular partner (who isn’t a virgin) before deciding to ditch this or that preventative measure? Yeah, they don’t protect you completely from HPV and all its lovely cancerous possibilities. But now men can get a vaccine that hopefully (if applied prior to the advent of their sexual hijinks) will keep them from getting or spreading this ‘invisible’ menace. Yay! Of course this does mean that most of the men in my generation are still suspect, but thankfully I like ‘em young anyway.

Now we just need to get that HIV vaccine finished up and all the ‘invisible’ menaces will be taken care of. Of course guys practicing safer sex and getting tested regularly should at least know if/when they have HIV and be honest when you ask them about it. When they aren’t, you can apparently have someone’s who is knowingly spreading HIV incarcerated, as the amazing women in the above video demonstrated with one philandering scuzz bucket.

Happy Humpday! Welcome back to the midweek stretch. Today is 09/09/09, which, coupled with the shortened week, means that today is an extra special Humpday. Humpday Extraordinaire! Let’s celebrate this super exciting day the best way we know how, with a little Link Lovin’! We’ve traveled to the end of the Internet per usual to bring you the best of the best of what’s out there. Enjoy!

- These days, safe sex ads are getting more and more brazen in their attempts to ditch the sugar-coating and get their point across. The Frisky rounded up the 12 craziest ones – including two that feature Hitler… which is enough to put the breaks on feeling sexy at all. Seriously, who wants to think about Hitler before they get busy. I guess the ad works.

- The last sex toy I ever want anywhere near my ladybits.

- Jiz Lee and April Flores, with Belladonna filming – does it get any hotter? I think not.

- Barcelona – a city rich in culture, heritage and… public sex? (via Carnal Nation via SunFiltered)

- Should the goverment pay for feminist porn? I’m sure you can guess what my answer is. And we are obvi not talking about the American government (sigh). (via Heartless Doll)

- Gay comic geek website that brings us the ” the unique gay perspective on pop culture” – how has this passed us by til now? Fanboy! (via Fleshbot)

- “Seizure makes woman believe she’s a man.” Interesting as this case is, I sure as hell hope that this doesn’t pathologize trans idenities and gender fluidity/questioning even more. Please. (via Sunfiltered)

- Fuck Yeah Butches! Lots of hot butches – who’s complaining? (via MrSexsmith Twitter)

- And lastly, an Ohio guy wanted a certain sex toy so badly that he drove his car into the store and stole it. He was so excited to get it, he forgot to put his car in park. Seriously. They got it on video. Wow. Desperate times…

(via The Consumerists)

Hope this gets you through the weekend!

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

(via buzzfeed)

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

Tail Of A Bondage Model: While I’m not usually into fetish really, I pretty much love anything Madison Young puts out.  And this rope bound romp not only brings on the kink and lots of it, we get a whole host of spoken word and visual art along with actual acting.  I love when Gauge (Jiz Lee) makes Madison pay for all the pain she’s caused in their relationship.  It’s got love, revenge and emotions that make me feel like Gauge is really hurting. All the elements of the perfect porn scene!

First Dates: Whether it’s Kimberly Kane pretending to be a vegan or April Flores pissing outdoors, this movie is all about the dialogue and acting to make it work just right.  Seriously, the sex is better in all three scenes because of the storyline.  And, of course, the story is better because of the sex!  They play off each other perfectly and make this movie one of my favorite smutty flicks.  Recommendations for all!

Nina Loves Girls: Nina loves girls, and we love both girls and Nina, so clearly this is a win-win movie for us!  The difference with this video is that Nina Hartley isn’t actually acting, she’s naturally this hot, kinky, fun!  All four scenes are packed full of awesome acting, super hot sex and Nina, Nina, Nina!

Safe Is Desire: Alright, I’ll admit it, this movie is totally ’90s and it kind of watches like a safer sex ed video.  But that’s what makes it so good, I promise!   Allie and Dion keep it hot and safe, which in turn kicks up the sex appeal even more.  Prepare yourself for dated outfits and frank discussions about HIV/AIDS, but don’t pass this one by!

Post Apocalyptic Cowgirls:  A radical dyke raunchfest in the desert – does it get hotter than that? Surgeon takes advantage of green-haired London’s sexy submissive ways and gets her going all over the sandy terrain.  Not a ton of talking, but they make me believe ever second of it.  If you like rough and tumble lezzie action, look no further.

Lights! Camera! Action!

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

Watch the Video

Studio: Fatale Media Category: Lesbian – Dyke Porn

This movie is awesome! A little after school special-ly and total 90s at times, but that really just adds to the charm that is a movie about safe sex being super hot. Allie and Dion are totally into each other and want to fuck, and being the smart girl that she is, Allie refuses to have sex unless it’s safe. Unfortunately Dion just doesn’t get it. But not to fear, because being in sex positive San Francisco in the mid-90s means that they can head over to the local dyke party that teaches ladies how to stay protected and safe as the suck and fuck the night away. And as any good love story goes, Dion comes around, learns the ropes and gloves up (and dams up) for the fuck of her life.  Hope I didn’t ruin the ending…

My favorite part is definitely when the club’s entertainment, the Safer Sex Sluts, comes on stage and shows the audience exactly how to stay healthy and keep their pussies in perfect condition. A blond, a brunette and a redhead, educating as they lick each others’ saran wrapped clits. Hot dykes, racy sex ed and lots of latex-ed up humping… what more could a queer pervy sex educator ask for? I mean really!  Two thumbs up!

-J.D. Bauchery

Sex Without Lube

The female body is so cool. Not only do we have an organ that’s only purpose is to emanate pleasure, our bodies take care of lubing themselves up when we get turned on. How hot is that! Going au natural can work great for some people, but even the wettest of women tend to dry out a little after a while. And there is nothing pretty about trying to get it on Sahara style. Sure, it hurts, but even worse, it can cause small tears in the vagina, which make STI transmission nice and easy. Plus, super dry sex can cause condom breakage – a recipe for disaster when coupled with easier STI transmission.

Fortunately, it takes about all of three seconds to remedy the dryness. Two drops of lube and boom, you’re back in business with hot, wet fucking! So add this one to the list and let’s banish the painfully common practice of sex without lube.

*Just a reminder: Stick with water- or silicone-based lubes. Oil-based lube can irritate the vagina and latex lubes can disintegrate condoms/dental dams/gloves. If you are using silicone toys, be sure to go with water-based lube, as a silicone-on-silicone relationship just doesn’t work out.

Avoiding STI Screenings

Time to get rid of this one for sure. I don’t care how busy you are – just do it. Go into the new season knowing exactly what’s what with your body. Even the lowest risk of women should be getting annual pelvic exams, which means there is no reason not to just add on a few extra tests. You are in the stirrups already! STI testing can be a very scary and nerve-wracking experience for many people, but with spring cleaning, we are tossing out those panicky feelings to make room for the responsible ones that we need to keep on top of our sexual health. If cost is an issue, check out local free and sliding scale clinics.

Sticking With Your Routine

You know you best, it’s true. You also know what works for you and how you like to get off. You know it so well, it’s like clockwork. You could do it in your sleep. In fact… you even might have. As nice as it is to know exactly what gets you going, doing the same thing on repeat – day after day, year after year – gets old fast.

Pause the boring button and start the diversification process with by adding little variations to your play. This could be anything from spending more time on foreplay, to forgoing the bed and fucking on the floor, to adding a third (forth, fifth…) participant to the mix.

Big or small, a change can reinvent the mundane instantly. It’s easy to forget that no matter how much you enjoy one thing, it doesn’t mean that the one thing is the do all and say all when it comes to your pleasure. Toss the same old to the curb this spring and get ready to change it up as the weather changes.

Be it a major clean up or a light organizing, spring cleaning is the perfect time to take a look at what you’ve got, what you want, and what you can or should do without. Use the excuse to really deep clean your sex life and figure out what works and what will hold you back from enjoying the warm mild months to their fullest.

Next stop, summertime!

J.D. Bauchery