New Sensations

“60% of the time, it works every time.” Unfortunately, Anchorman – A XXX Parody fell into the other 40%.

Of course, expecting anything to live up to the original Anchorman is asking way too much. It was a magical mix of characters filled with one liners that you just can’t help but recite, even years after it’s release. Regardless, I just didn’t love it. It wasn’t a total bust, but it isn’t at the top of my list of parodies to watch.

As the story goes, Ron and the boys have lost their jobs at the news station and are all working at random places, wishing for the days of old. Mr. Burgundy’s brilliant idea to get them back on the news team is to pay a visit to Veronica Corningstone (Tasha Reign) and make magic happen under the sheets. The rest of his crew follows suit by hopping in the sack with the all-lady news cast.

As you can imagine, the boning goes down. The sex scenes are decent, but not out of the ordinary. Per my usual complaint, no one fucks in character. I get that it is a challenge to do this, but if you’re going to make the Anchorman XXX Parody, I think you should fuck the way you think Champ or Brick would fuck. Throw in an “I love lamp,” or something… anything!

One distracting element for me was Jack Lawrence’s not so good Ron Burgundy voice. He certainly gave it a lot of effort, which may have been the problem. It just wasn’t believable for me. Also, Tasha as Miss Corningstone was not a win for me. Again, who could fill Christina Applegate’s shoes? Brian (Dale Dabone) won the award for most entertaining. He totally grasped the character and seemed completely comfortable and natural. He is the man when it comes to the porno parodies. His scene with Aiden Starr was fantastic from every angle – the characters were believable and the van sex was dirty and hot. Aiden was really able to put on the news reporter facade and she had the voice/”non-regional dialect” down!

Is it worth the watch? That is for you to decided. If you’re an Anchorman fan, I think you should check it out and see. Just because my expectations were high, that doesn’t mean you won’t like it!

Watch Anchorman – A XXX Parody (Disc 1) now!

Watch Disc 2 for special features!

Love,

Ginger

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Studio: New Sensations Category: Features

Apparently there’s quite the vampire craze going around nowadays, so much so that for todays review I picked “Dark Angels 2.” The plot looked interesting for a vamp flick and I’ve a thing for guys with pale skin, which I’m hoping “Dark Angels 2″ will be sure to pack in spades though I’ll take fair skinned brunettes with delicate hints of pink in all the right places, like their pulse points.

The opening credits are pretty awesome, gritty and well done they could be setting the scene for a blockbuster or a b-level horror flick but they definitely don’t scream ‘porn,’ instead I get the feeling that I should be settling in with a big bowl of popcorn. Of course the credits open right up on nameless sexy times in a questionably dirty environment. It might just be me, but when I see a trash filled crack house and moldy mattress, the last thing I want to do is get naked and roll my ladybits around on it – color me not horny. The scene with Tommy Gunn in the diner kitchen – much hotter – still makes part of me go ‘ew gross’ industrial kitchen, but hey at least they kind of cleaned it first.

Sketchy sex scene aside, the movie was actually shot better than the worst mainstream vampire movie I saw. That one’s budget was so low they actually had to use the ‘hold the stake under the arm and pretend it pierced something vital’ trick. “Dark Angels 2″ was more limited by the performers acting than either the script or the cinematography. There is one thing not going in its favor, there was a huge discrepancy in volume, I found myself turning the sound all the way up for plot points and all the way down during sex scenes to keep from blasting my eardrums with the music, I could barely hear the girls over all that noise at all, especially after I lowered the volume.

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