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Merry XXXmas
Written by: J.D. on December 22nd, 2011
Ho Ho Ho, Happy Holidays! For you, a toy truck; for you a new iPod; and for you, a nice white cumshot! Merrrrry Christmas! Sometimes all you want for Christmas is splooge. Sure, I know that the money shot get a bad rap in porn – that it signifies all that is male-focused in dirty movies. While I do agree that when it comes to mainstream porno movies, the cumshot is the pièce de résistance, I think there is something to be said about some women really fucking enjoying their dude’s pearly white cum, be it on their faces, tits, or wherever else he shoots. I get that there is more to sex than that, but who am I to yuck someone else’s yum (aka. rain on their parade)? So today I am bringing a few white cumshots into the holiday mix with this festive Private XXXmas Sextravaganza.
 I’ve talked about it before, but it totally bugs me when a themed movie only sticks to the theme on the box cover and in the name. C’mon guys, how hard is it to wear a fucking Santa hat while getting your cock sucked? I mean really. Thankfully this movie does it up right, bringing Christmas right into the dirty action, starting with hot blond Nikky Thorn all dolled up in a German dress (?) in front of the old Christmas tree, ready to read us some holiday tales.
First up is a story about a very special ornament that grants a magical Christmas wish to Lea Lexis while trims her tree. What does she want, you ask? To be fucked in the ass – and two very horny Santas come to town to make her wish come true. Looks like the naughty girls get what’s on their lists too! One Santa fucks her ass while the other rams his Christmas cock right down her chimney (um, you know, her throat). And if I’m not mistaken, one of the Santas starts singing Jingle Bells as we teabags Lea’s waiting mouth. This is more holiday hotness than I could have ever asked for!
Other stories include an angel girl and a devil girl fucking, Santa getting a blow job in a rundown public bathroom, three angel ladies in hot lingerie getting it on together, and a huge hard-body Santa fucking Cathy Heaven (and then give her all the sex toys in his bag). And finally at the end, our special storyteller, Nikky, gets her own Santa Surprise. Two thumbs up for this VERY festive holiday porno! Thanks Private.
Watch “An XXXmas Sextravaganza – Dreaming Of A White Cumshot” Now!
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Written by: J.D. on December 24th, 2010
Out of all of the holiday porno I’ve watched lately, this is the one that pleases me the most! I’d never heard of Mandy Goodhandy, but thanks to a broad search for XXXmas movie I can look forward to a 2011 packed full of fun reality fucking!
I’m not sure how this studio went unnoticed for so long, but tell me this doesn’t sound fantastic:
The Mandy Goodhandy show is shot in front of a live nightclub audience every Wednesday at Goodhandy’s, a Toronto pansexual bar. The show includes the raw and intelligent comedy of Mandy Goodhandy, followed by a live porn shoot right on stage in front of the audience.
That’s right, live porno with a crowd full of crazy fans and a hilarious queen leading the whole thing.
In the first scene, you’ll get to know Mandy and a bunch of studs before she brings out Tim Thomas and Johnny Maverick – that’s when things get really good. Maverick is totally hung but that doesn’t stop Thomas from swallowing his cock whole. His reward is to be drilled on a leather bench in front of a crowd of appreciative dudes. It’s hot and the live audience adds a element of electricity that is often missing in amateur porn. By the end, Thomas is begging Maverick to come in his face and, since it’s the season of giving, he complies!
Next up is an end of the year celebration. Lucky for us, Maverick and Thomas areback and this time they’re joined by a crew of studs looking to fuck and suck in the New Year. There’s a ton of hot action, but watching Thomas get fucked by a bunch of dudes was the highlight for me. The energy of this scene is off the charts and I highly recommend it if you’re into amateur stuff.
Mandy and her crew cover both Christmas and New Years all in one spectacular porno! Finding this studio is truly a gift that will keep on giving…
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Written by: J.D. on December 23rd, 2010
Merry fucking Christmas! It’s that time of year again when the whole family gets together to eat, make merriment and have a massive orgy around the table? Wait, what? Now, I may not know all of the various x-mas traditions (I am a Jew after all), but I am guessing that it’s also not customary to bring a gift of lesbians decked out in festive garb to help lead that family orgy? Or maybe it is – who can say, but all I know is that these are the ways that Private brings the holiday cheer. And I, for one, am not complaining.
 Before the orgy action is even brought to the table (that works in so many ways), these hordes of horn-balls are already schtupping all over the house. It doesn’t matter who they came to the table with, they definitely get busy with someone totally different. Mrs. Miller (the super hot Mandy Bright) made lovely lasagna that I’m sure got cold while she fucks the neighbor, her husband screws his son’s fiancé, the son bangs the neighbor’s wife, and the daughter and her man get busy in the bathtub. Like I said – there is a whole lotta fucking! Ho Ho Ho!
After all that sexin’ the couples come back to the table and feast on the meal, only to have a delicious dessert of the aforementioned lesbian driven orgy. I will say that as mildly creeped out that I am when family members are fucking around in the same room (though not with each other!), the orgy is my favorite scene of this movie. Maybe it’s the super ridiculousness of it all, but I’m guessing it has more to do with the “gifts” who come in and lead all of the action. What can I say, I’m obviously a sucker for hot ladies touching each other’s bits. Shocker, I know. But lesbian sexin’ aside, the orgy is one hell of a hot scene and definitely deserves to be a holiday tradition! I’m already eagerly awaiting next year!
Watch “A Fucking Christmas Dinner” Now!
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Homegrown Video is one of the oldest and best amateur studios in adult. They basically distribute homemade XXX to the masses – talk about porno by the people, for the people! I’m not super into handjobs, but couldn’t pass up the chance to highlight this one just a few days before Christmas.
So, since I’m working hard to stay on the nice list, I’ll be honest and admit I only watched the second Santa scene. I mean, who can pass up the chance to watch the man in red get his not so tiny toy rocket waxed by the very gorgeous Ava Marie. This lady is surely a gift with that tall, lean body!
She starts off on his lap (of course) before dropping down to her knees in front of him. While this movie is strictly about handjobs, she doesn’t pass up the chance to taste Santa’s pole throughout the video. While I’m still not in love with this type of movie, she is amazing to watch and obviously enjoys getting her guy off. A lot of scenes from this genre star women who seem 100% not interested in the action, so it was nice to see a couple have some sexy fun together.
These was one genderbending part that caught me by surprise, but was kind of cool. At one point toward the end of the movie she sits on his lap so his cock is right in her crotch, jerking him off almost like it was her cock. I’m going to guess this wasn’t intentional, but I thought it was pretty interesting and worth noting.
In the end, she takes a load to the face and is absolutely adorable about it. I know that sounds weird, but this girl is so cute and into the scene – I loved it!
If you’re into this type of XXX, this one will definitely raise your holiday spirit. If it’s not your thing, be sure to check out other videos from Homegrown Video. They’re a studio everyone should know about.
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Written by: J.D. on December 21st, 2010
I don’t want a lot for Christmas – there’s just one thing I need. I don’t care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree. I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know. Make my wish come true. All I want for Christmas is… Bleu.
As in Bleu Productions, that is. As in the hottest fetish erotica from filmmaker Maria Beatty. Her movies are amazingly sexy and visually stunning in a way that make them so much more than mere pornos. So this special pre-Christmas Top Five is all about the Bleu that makes my XXX-mas dreams come true.
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Strap-On Motel: This amazing Bleu masterpiece is all about the last scene, when London dons a chin harness and Dylan Ryan takes control, riding her face while working her clit with a Hitachi. Holy ridiculous hotness! I haven’t seen many scenes that feature a chin harness, and I’m not typically into them, but it totally works after watching the sexual tension build throughout. To be honest, this is probably the hottest strap-on film I’ve seen. Just watch it! |
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The Black Glove: What’s black and white and wet all over? This erotic noir journey through the world of female dominance and submission, of course. Every thing about this film is well done – it’s shot beautifully, the timing is impeccable, and the women are gorgeous. And at less then half an hour, it’s short enough to watch in entirety, but long enough for a deliciously sensual experience. |
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Skateboard Kink Freak: Obviously I would like any movie that stars Michelle Aston, but this kinktastic romp rocked my world more than even expected. It was scene three that really did it for me, with Amber tied to a skateboard and pounded into with a strap on. Always the scientist, Aston uses physics background to her benefit as she rolls the tied up Amber back and forth on her hard silicone cock. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather see this skateboard trick than a half-landed kick flip any day. |
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Tight Security: How could I leave out this feisty gem with all the TSA touchy gropey business going on? All I can say is that a strip search never looked so damn hot! Security, I think we need a full cavity search on this one. |
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Post Apocalyptic Cowgirls: Two tattooed, gritty post apocalyptic cowgirls dressed in leather, boots and bad attitudes cross paths on the Arizona highway and fuck wildly in the empty desert. I mean really, does it get better than that? Of course not! I might not recommend this hardcore lesbo flick to someone looking for a soft focus lens and romantic tribbing, but for all of us down and dirty dykes, I say this one is for you! |
Merry Christmas! Crossing my fingers for a Bleu XXX-mas!
xoxo
J.D.
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Written by: J.D. on December 21st, 2010
There are two things I require in an XXX-mas movie. First, there needs to be some actual holiday gear in the scenes, and not just on the box cover. That means I want Santa hats, white fur trim, red lingerie (velvet if you want to go all out) and maybe some candy cane stripes for good measure. And I expect these to be featured throughout the video to really bring the holiday cheer home. Anyone can stick a red hat on a model, snap a cover picture and call it a Christmas flick, but if you want to impress me, you’ve gotta do it up right. Fucking is great, but I came here for the XXX-mas!
 The second requirement is Nina Hartley. Well, ok, Nina Hartley doesn’t actually have anything to do with Christmas, and she isn’t really a requirement, but this video randomly has her stuck on the end, going at it solo on a lawn chair in a very un-Christmassy scene. And because I love this porno legend, I am making her presence a requirement as well. Who’s gonna argue that?
And where are we getting these two musts filled? A Very Creamy Christmas, of course! I’ll admit I wasn’t totally sold on the name, but once I took a peek and saw both holiday cheer AND Nina Hartley, I settled in to check the whole thing out. And I’m pretty happy I did!
Along with holiday and Hartley, this flick has a third component that made it stand out to me. Not quite P.O.V. (point of view) and not quite gonzo, the women in this video talk towards the camera and dirty talk to the viewer. I love the pseudo-interaction/engaging, without the extra raunchiness that we usually get from gonzo. I especially love Nina Hartley’s semi-educational dirty talk. There is something so super sexy about someone who can make sex ed enticing (I’m including myself in this category).
So, let’s get back to the true meaning of this review – XXX-mas! Merry fucking Christmas! These ladies go above and beyond when it comes to being as naughty nice as possible and make sure to add those extra Santa references as they have their pussies plowed by dicks and toys. That’s right Santa, deposit those presents riiiiiiight there! All-in-all, a quality “ho ho ho”-laden fuck fest.
Watch “A Very Creamy Christmas” Now!
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Written by: J.D. on December 20th, 2010
We are totally in the holiday spirit here at HM4Her (possibly even listening to Christmas tunes as we type) and we plan to bring that over-enthusiasm to the site with a whole week of posts that mention the impending 25th day of this month. What can we say, we are a festive bunch!
To kick this week off right, here are some of my favorite dirty ornaments!
(xgen products)
Because who doesn’t like a little gender-bending? Also, Santa, I want those shoes!
(lotionspotionsvibes)
While a boob is a little creepy by itself without the context of a chest, I would still want a whole tree full of these nipple-y x-mas balls! Read the rest of this entry »
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Written by: J.D. on December 20th, 2010
What do our favorite porn performers think about the industry? Inquiring minds want to know! Well, we asked and they answered! Welcome to our latest editor’s spotlight column, where we ask a bunch of stars the same question and see what kind of awesome answers grace our inbox.
This month’s question:
We know you’ve all been super nice… as well as deliciously naughty this year, so… what tops your holiday wish list?
Free healthcare and college education for all Americans. – Aiden Starr
 I love the holidays, they are my favorite time of year, though, living in Toronto, the snow can get me down a bit. So! This year the top of my holiday wish list is occupied by a trip to other climes. My first stop would be Paris and then Berlin where I am working on a sort-of top secret new project that is guaranteed to be super sexy and groundbreaking. After Europe, maybe Aruba? Or, I have always wanted to visit Cuba while I still live in Canada and can fly direct. To help make my travel dreams come true, I am officially making my wish list full of airmiles donations, airline giftcards and the ever-lovely; cold, hard cash. Dreams into reality, that’s what the ho ho holidays are all about! Wishing everyone much joy and all the things they most want this year. xxo – Dylan Ryan
Top of my holiday wishlist? A wonderful 2011 for myself, my partner, our kitties and our loved ones. Sounds cheesy, I know, but honestly, being able to get by, having less pain than I might, and having my perfect queer-tastic family with our fabulous friends is what I love. I guess if I had to say something tangible, I’d love to have my student loans and medical debt paid off, so we could start saving for a house. Happy non-denomination season of joy, love, giving and capitalism! – Shanna Katz
What tops my Holiday wishlist this year is for everyone to run out & buy AlphaFemmes! The film releases in January (street date TBA), and the DVD will be available for purchase at www.alphafemmes.com. Pre-orders begin in late December. Wholesale inquiries please contact wholesale@annadevia.com. (and coming to VOD as well!) – Anna Devia
 My holiday wishlist consist of:
- Vintage 1960′s Swiss Hermes 3000 Typewriter ( i have a huge type writer fetish)
- a phonograph or record player
- Some of my friend Alana’s delicious vegan peanut butter bars
- Dressing Gown from Agent Provocateur
- Bondage Ilya Fleet Reins from Coco de mer
- Bondage Ilya Fleet Web Body Piece from Coco de mer
- Bondage Ilya Fleet Dog Mask from Coco de mer
- Designer pearl anal beads from
Coco de mer – Madison Young
Funny you should ask! We actually made a wish list for our studios that includes things like Polaroid film, books, and a Brevis with rails and shoulder-mount with L2 cineglass. But the thing at the top of our list is probably a new bed! – Shine & the Crash Pad Gang
Besides world peace and and end to hunger and violence against women and children in DR Congo, I want an agent! I want to take my message of sexual sanity and happiness to a wider audience and need a good, for-real agent to do so. Oh, yes, and more hot sex with my hubby! – Nina Hartley
 What tops my holiday wish list? I like to write nasty stories for my lovers. I was lucky enough to have one of my stories fulfilled on my birthday and I would love to have another one come to fruition. What a great Christmas present to have one of my Vampire stories brought to life or one of the dirty Lesbian bar scenes become reality. Gifts last a few moments, memories last a lifetime. : ) – Melissa Monet
A gift card to buy an awesome dress for the AVN awards! Also, gift card for the spa/fitness center at the hotel during AVN so I can de-stress and get those endorphins going. Happy holidays everybody! – Mistress D Severe
Multiple orgasms for everybody who needs them! (That should take care of holiday stress and uncivil public discourse. Not to mentions starting the new year out well!) – Carol Queen
 An exciting year of hot projects, sexy films and loads of educational experiences. That’s what tops my list next year. I’ve been focused on my life for a while, with a big move to LA, and now I’m really excited to get back into work mode. So, an year of many great, and sometimes silly, projects tops my holiday wish list. That and I’d love 101 Positions for Lovers to win the AVN Award for best educational DVD. Even if it’s just an honor to be nominated. – Jamye Waxman
2010 has been a challenging year. What tops my Holiday wish list is for things to get better in 2011. I would love for everyone to have their health and happiness, but also for everyone to struggle less in the upcoming year. – April Flores
On the top of my holiday wish list is… myself! I’m giving myself more free time, more healthy meals, and fun physical activities like dancing, swimming, hiking and creating art. I’m gifting myself with quality nights alone to read books I’ve been wanting to finish, I’m showering myself with good times with friends. And I’m allowing myself to open my present early, and every day. And more masturbation, of course. – Jiz Lee
Thank you so much to everyone who participated! If you are a porn performer/director and are interested in answering our questions, please email me!
xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery
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