Written by:
J.D. on April 22nd, 2010
The Bolivian President is a little late to the party on the idea that it’s eating cock that makes guys gay…
Duh. Also, that dude is totally wrong and we can’t believe and anyone would even think up an idea like that. Sigh.
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Written by:
J.D. on March 3rd, 2010
Happy Humpday! Welcome back to the mid-week stretch. And welcome to March – the month that goes in lion and out like a lamb. It’s the month that officially brings us into the spring season, and I could not be happier. There’s nothing I love more than spring… well, watching folks fuck on screen isn’t too shabby either, but spring means I can watch people fucking on screen with the windows open! Anyway, that and the fact that it’s Humpday has put be in a fabulous mood and has me giddy and searching through the interwebs with vigor! Good thing you get the fruits of my labor! So sit back, relax and let’s get to it with a little link love!
- XKCD always seems to get it right, especially when they talk about sex.
- Speaking of things that are geeky awesome – Playing D & D With Porn Stars. That’s right, Dungeons and Dragons… Holy crap, does it get any nerdier/sexier?! I think not. (via Fleshbot)
- Fabulous San Francisco-based queer porn empire Pink and White Productions has recently published their safer sex best practices in porn standards, complete with health resources. Healthy safe sex = Awesomeness. Thanks Pink and White! (via Tiny Nibbles)
- Queer porn star Jiz Lee is all about giving back to the community and is hoping that we will help out too – with a special porno incentive to make it super extra worth your while! We <3 Jiz!
- Finally! A study that tells porn like it is – that it’s not harmful and yes, it can even be beneficial!
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Written by:
J.D. on November 19th, 2009
Man, oh man, that Carrie Prejean has a big decision in front of her. In yesterday’s Link Love, I mentioned that the former Miss California was approached by porn mega studio Vivid Entertainment Group and offered $1 million to star in a movie for them. Apparently they even have a copy of her much talked about sex tape (or tapes – there are rumors of eight videos floating around)! So, will she or won’t she??
Honestly, I would have been totally pro Prejean porn, until Donald Trump got involved and reminded me that it would be a bad idea.
Trump told one source. “Maybe,” Mr. Trump said only half-jokingly, “she should become a major porn star, make millions of dollars, and give it to worthy causes.” [via NYPost]
Remembering that Prejean is super anti gay marriage and that’s where all the money would go, I’ve changed my stance. Sorry Vivid, I just can’t chance it that she would deliver funds to help discriminate against us gays.
I guess that free boob job will just have to go un-ogled.
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Written by:
J.D. on November 18th, 2009
Written by:
J.D. on November 4th, 2009
Happy Humpday! Welcome back to the mid-week stretch. It’s November now – can you believe it? Halloween is done and gone and we are moving into holiday territory and falling temps. Lucky for us, this week’s Link Love is hotter than ever, so let’s get to it!
- In response to all the frostbitten nipple worries of the world, Japan’s Thanko has released their latest invention, the USB powered breast warming pads (pictured). Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t usually have frigid tits… especially when I am close enough to my computer to feasibly plug my boob warmers in. Back to the drawing board guys – and this time get some ladies to help you come up with something useful.
- While Playboy has always been about having ladies get into compromising position, their latest addition is a first, even for them. Yoga enthusiast/2007 Playmate of the Year Sara Jean Underwood as created a bunch of videos for Playboy demonstrating some of her favorite poses. I feel a crunchy Kama Sutra joke coming on… but doesn’t it just write itself? (via HuffPo)
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Written by:
FrzKey on October 19th, 2009
So, someone using the name “Tara” wants their daughter to be a porn star. Yes, you heard me right. They have an 18 year old daughter and a contact in the industry that’s promising this parental unit stardom and 400k a year contracts for their beautiful baby girl. Yes – seriously I couldn’t make up this kind of thing I’m not, quite, that debauched yet.
(BuzzFeed via The Frisky)
First, I hope this is a joke. Otherwise it’s the stuff of Jerry Springer’s nightmares, or wet dreams – take your pick. Second, there’s very little that’s more awesome than a parent that loves and supports you as you fumble around trying to discover who you are and how to make a place for yourself in the world, even if your path happens to have a porny detour. On the other hand, there’s little worse than a parent who expects you to fail right off the bat at everything except porn. And third, who in their right mind wouldn’t be creeped out by both their friend offering this to them (shouldn’t this ‘friend’ be talking to the daughter instead?) and then thinking it is ok to suggest to their daughter!?!
Major ew’s all around on this one – makes me feel dirty right down to my hair follicles. Go Monday, it’s only going to get better from here, because it certainly can’t go downhill.
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Written by:
J.D. on October 8th, 2009
Over the years, I’ve given up on the fight against sexy Halloween costumes. If ladies are old enough (read: of age) to vote, they should be able to pick a costume without getting totally berated by folks like me that think they are lame. Like seriously, who really needs a “Sexy Dentist” at their Halloween party? I’m just sayin’.
I do draw the line somewhere though and The Sexist drew my attention to bunch of vomit inducing costumes on shevles this year. While the whole list is hideous (the Spaghetti and Penis costume? Yeah dude, that will get you laid. Ew.), there were two particular costumes that really got to me.
First:
A “Sexy Nemo” costume. Yeah, Nemo from Finding Nemo. If that’s not seriously WTF, then I don’t know what is. I can take Sexy Cop, but an animated fish from a Pixar movie, sexified? No thanks!
The Second:
The” Sexy Clown.” I don’t know about you, but like a lot of people, clowns freak me the hell out. A “Sexy Clown” is extra, double scary.
The only way I wanna see my clowns is like this:
Yes, they are still horrifying, but at least they are too busy fucking to steal my soul with their evil painted faces and vengeful squeaker noses. Ick.
This year I think I am going to be a”Sexy Bull Semen Collector.” I actually bet I could pick that up at the local costume shop. After Nemo, anything is possible.
xoxo
-J.D. “what ever happened to being a witch? Bauchery
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Written by:
J.D. on July 20th, 2009
There are some stories that make you just wanna shake your head and sigh.
A California woman thought she’d save some cash by taking matters into her own hands and performing a little DIY plastic surgery on her own face. Ordering silicone from the internet for $10, the lady proceeced to shoot it into her lips and cheeks. Of course the next day her whole face became totally inflammed and swollen and she ended up needing a series of operations to correct it anyway.
How ridiculous is that! And I haven’t even gotten to the best part yet!
She did this because she had it done by her doctor before and thought it would be just as easy to get the same results doing it herself. Whether it would have worked or not is a moot point, because as it turns out, the doctor had used medical grade silicone to smooth out her face. What this woman purchased was silicone personal lubricant. Yep… she injected lube into her face.
I don’t know which is worse, that she put lube in her face, or that she really thought doing it herself was a good idea.
Let this be a lesson to us all. Lube on your bits = awesomeness. Lube in your face = not so great.
Well, at least it wasn’t the warming kind.
xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery
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