Evan Stone

I mentioned on my personal Facebook that I was watching the porno version of the First Wives Club, and let me tell you, people were excited!  Just as excited as I was to find this Sweet Sinema flick.  I don’t know if you remember the original Bette Midler, Diane Keaton, Goldie Hawn movie, but it’s basically the story of three college friends who are now grown and each dealing with the crumbling of their own marriages in different ways.  It’s a pretty good movie, if you ask me, but definitely not one I thought I’d see made into a porno.  But at the hands of awesome female director Nica Noelle, this remake holds its own.

Starring Raylene, Helly Mae Hellfire and Nina Hartley as the three scorned wives (Bette, Goldie and Diane, respectively), this version actually follows the original story pretty closely.  Raylene’s husband Evan Stone leaves her for a much younger girl during his mid-life crisis, Helly’s husband drops her for a much younger actress and Nina’s man divorces her, while sleeping with their marriage counselor.  See, just like the original.  The only real difference is the sex.  And there is lots of it!

The steamy action doesn’t begin until the second scene, letting the story unfold a bit before getting down and dirty.  I will say that I got a little excited during scene one with Nina Hartley baking a cake.  Is it wrong that I love watching Nina Hartley bake almost as much as I like watching her fuck?  I guess that’s what happens when you have a zaftig chick reviewing your pornos, right?  Anyway, there is something amazing about Nina Hartley playing Diane Keaton’s role.

But back to the sex!  The screwin’ starts with Evan Stone and Chastity Lynn (the younger woman) and moves to Mark Wood and Ash Hollywood.  In fact, we don’t get one of the wives fucking until Nina Hartley takes on the marriage counselor her husband is boning (Evelyn Lin) and gives her a big dose of lady loving.   Only after that do we get Helly fucking a new screenwriter (Seth Gamble) and Raylene with her new boyfriend (Bruce Venture) – which she reveals only after brushing off her husband who has crawled back.
While I’m not exactly sure of the difference between Sweet Sinema and Sweet Sinner, since they are both directed by Nica Noelle, I will say that this film definitely gets two thumbs up!

Watch “Wives Club” Now!

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It seems that I’ve been on a bit of a Lily LaBeau kick this week, it being Wednesday, and this being the second movie I am reviewing with her involved.  How could I not be on a Lily LaBeau kick though, she is not only super sexy, she is totally sweet and a definitely a bit girl-next-door (a total turn on).  And since this is a Sweet Sinner flick, directed by Nica Noelle, I know I’m watching her really get off and enjoy herself – something that is a big deal to me when I’m watching dirty movies.

We start out this series sequel with a tryst between LaBeau and Evan Stone, who play interviewing secretary and interviewer boss, respectively.   Lily gets her blackmail on and exerts her power over Evan Stone, initiating a really hot fuck.  I’d feel ‘eh’ about the blackmail if Stone wasn’t trying to do it to her first.  I can’t help it – my values even come up during porno.  I love that Evan Stone looks so damn angry when they start to fuck.  He does a really good job of acting like he isn’t into it, for about 30 seconds, when the excitement gets to be too much to ignore.  I also love that Lily takes her large hoop earrings out.  Yep, girl is about to throw down!  And she certainly does, the pair of them fucking in a ton of positions all over the couch in his office.  Oh and yes, she gets the job.

The second Lily LaBeau scene features her with Rocco Reed, a total boy-next-door.  Get the pair of them together and they are the super couple next door neighbors that you love to hear fucking (get it, because they both look so “next door”).  Anyway, Rocco is a new hire that Lily gets to ‘show the ropes’ and take on a tour of the office.  Why not start with the conference room?  It’s nice and… spacious.  They get down to business right away, taking their clothes off and making great use of the conveniently located couch.  Does this office have a couch in every room??  I love watching Lily and Rocco fuck because they both look so innocent and sweet that it’s really fun to see them get down and dirty.

I guess I can’t forget to mention that Raylene, Christian, Joey Brass and Zoe Voss are in this flick as well – and all do a wicked hot job.   Thanks for everything Sweet Sinner… especially my second helping of Lily LaBeau this week.

Watch “The Secretary 2” Now!

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This year, the AVN Awards are all about the parodies – even going as far as to have parody porns get their own category.  And because we are reviewing a few of this year’s nominees (the actual awards are this coming weekend), what better to review than one of the many parodies nominated.  Then, of course, it took a while to figure out which one to review, because there are way more than a few – and we’ve already reviewed a bunch as well.  Finally I decided on This Ain’t Ghostbusters XXX.  I mean, honestly, how could I not?  In fact, I was pretty blown away that we hadn’t actually reviewed it yet.

Snapping up six 2012 AVN nominations  (Best Parody – Comedy, Best Screenplay – Parody, Best Actor – Evan Stone, Best Special Effects,  Best Art Direction, and Best Cinematography), this ‘80s movie pornofied features a bevy of household names like Evan Stone, James Deen, Ron Jeremy, Alexis Texas and more.  When you pair that with direction by renowned parody maker Axel Braun, you know you are going to get something good.

Now, it’s been a minute since I watched the original Ghostbusters, but from what I can tell, this dirty version does an excellent job of mixing the authentic awesomeness with lots of naughty action.  And Evan Stone really is fucking hilarious as Bill Murray’s Dr. Peter Venkman.  I guess since Ghostbusters is a pretty famous flick, they really didn’t need to bother with too much back story before starting in on the sexin’.  Within 5 minutes Stone has his giant cock all the way down Lily LaBeau’s creamy throat.  And about 5 minutes after that scene is finished, Alec Knight has his pants around his ankles and is screwing the very dead Alexis Texas, who is a ghostly maiden inhabiting the public library.  I guess that’s one way to catch a ghost, right?

Soon after, we meet Dana Barrett (Raven Alexis) who’s having some trouble with her apartment  being haunted.  Oh, you know, the same old ghostly activity of slinging hot dogs all willy-nilly at Dana and inhabiting a refrigerator and turning it into a tear in space/time/universe.  So, who does Dana call?  That’s right, the Ghostbusters!  *Cue theme music here* And while that’s awesome and all, the one I’ve really been excited to meet shows himself in scene 3 – Slimer!  That’s right, the green guy appears and slimes all over Evan Stone, and then jerks his slimy cock as they zap him into their little ghostly vault.  Very impressive special effects as well (definitely deserving of the nomination).

Ok, back to Dana, who is now Zuul.  “There is no Dana, only Zuul.” (Man, I forgot how much I love that line – hilarious.)  Peter Venkman is super into Dana and finds himself fucking Zuul now. Yum.  Alright, It seems that I’ve veered off into nostalgia and am going all over the place with this review.  You basically need to know three things about this flick to really sum it up:

1. It’s pretty fucking hilarious and if you like the original Ghostbusters and you like porn, you’ll like this.
2. The sex is really seriously hot.  Everyone who fucks is really hot too.
3. This movie basically deserves all the nominations it got.

That’s it.  Now go watch, because it’s amazing and you should definitely see for yourself.

Watch “This Ain’t Ghostbusters XXX” Now!

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If there are two things I love to watch in this world it’s porn and horror.  Put them together and I’m a happy girl.

Creature Feature gives a few vignettes of your tried and true generic horror flicks.  Coming in at first place is definitely Bride of Fuckenstein.  They definitely had fun with it and put everything they had into the scene.  It was totally silly, but I loved it, all of it – the Halloween décor, bride’s store bought costume, but I mostly loved Evan Stone’s commitment to the Dr. Stein character.  His opening monologue is fantastic.  As he beholds bride’s brain, he is going on about sloppy blow jobs and ball sucking in his own brand of Evan Stone-ness. If you only watch a small portion of this movie, watch the first 5 minutes.  The ball sucking dialogue and the look on Evan’s face when he says “it’s alive” is totally worth it.  He is a guy that enjoys his job and it shows.  I love when porn stars get into their characters, it makes me that much more interested in watching them fuck.

Okay, while this movie was entertaining and the sexin’ was decent, I have to say that the mummy scene was not a win for me.  There was just something a little unsettling.  I didn’t like the perfect hole that was cut out of the mummy’s pants that was just big enough to fit his cock through.  Actually, I’m not sure if it was the hole or the khaki rubber pants that bothered me.  Why not just wrap him in gauze?  Why the pants?  Either way, I just couldn’t get into it.

Regardless of pant choices, Creature Feature is a fun porno to watch to get you in the spirit of Halloween.  While most people carve pumpkins and make candy apples, we peddle smut and think it’s the best way to get into the spirit!  It’s not going to change your life, but this movie will give you a chuckle while simultaneously getting you all (chocolate covered) antsy in the pantsy.

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When I think porn, I don’t usually go right to knock down, drag out competition (unless I’m watching a little Ultimate Surrender), but that’s just what this trifecta of orgies is – a competition between three directors to feature the best orgy scene they can. Not only is that an awesome idea, it’s fantastic in practice as well.

Marc Dorcel got filmmakers Herve Bodilis, Christoph Clark and Paul Thomas to go head-to-head against each other and create a full movie that has one of the longest performer lists I’ve ever encountered. Very impressive. And I can’t forget to mention that all the scenes are of the highest quality video as well. Seriously delicious.

First up is Herve Bodilis, with a story of kidnapping and domination as this fancy French lady gets what she wants from all the submissives around her. I love love love that this woman is curvy and a little zaftig, though it seems like the woman she kidnapped is actually the protagonist of the story. Soon the blond, busty kidnapping victim (which is incredibly weird to write in a porn review) finds herself in the middle of an orgy full of costumed party-goers. So much fucking in one room!! If you like watching orgies, this scene is totally one to check out.

Next up we get “Private Orgy” by Chrisoph Clark. Set in a mansion in the beautiful countryside, this scene features a house full of glamorous women just waiting to please whoever walks through the door. The first real action is between the madame and one of her ladies. It’s not the most realistic lesbian sex I’ve ever seen, definitely girl-on-girl (yes, there is a big difference), but still pretty hot. Soon the johns start showing up and the whole scene turns into a debaucherous fuckfest full of screwing both indoors and outside. English with French subtitles.

And lastly we get “The Key Party” from director Paul Thomas. This scene, starring Asa Akira and Anthony Rosano, brings us a group sex newbie experience. Asa plays a nervous girlfriend going into an orgy to make her boyfriend happy (something I don’t condone – don’t let anyone force you into anything, but this is porn so I’ll let it slide). Soon the bowl of keys comes out and people begin pairing off to screw around. The couple is separated and the whole room begins watching a porn movie and feeling up on each other. Newbie Akira is paired with smut legend Evan Stone, while Rosano gets a brunette I couldn’t recognize and everyone ends up having what looks to be an amazing time. Good stuff. Again, English with French titles.

Out of the three movies, I’d have to say that Paul Thomas’ “The Key Party” was the scene I enjoyed the most. Something about key parties just seems so ‘70s and risqué, which to me is way more exciting than a straight up group fuck romp. All in all, though, this whole movie is worth a watch. If orgy do it for you, then this championship is the one for you!

Watch “Orgy: The XXX Championship” Now!

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Here at HM4Her, we are multifaceted.  Sure, we love some super hot deep dicking, girls going crazy on each other’s boxes, and even extreme kink at times – but we are also total suckers for the softer side of porn.  We gave you a taste with last week’s Top Five, focusing on just how awesome making out can be. Today we are all about the super sensual sexy flicks.  You know, those romance books with the quivering members and busting corsets – only this time those engorged swords are hilt deep in love tunnels.  I should be writing those stories, shouldn’t I?  Anyway, today is a celebration of the desperately seductive, so let’s get our bustles laced and our daggers unsheathed.

Evan Essence: Not only is this Inpulse TV movie one of the first pornos I ever reviewed, it was also the first taste I ever had of Evan Stone.  I didn’t even have a clue how big he was in the adult world!  It’s hilarious for me to think about that now.  Anyway, this flick is the epitome of sensuality, traveling through various time periods to show different eras of getting it on.  The subtitle gets it totally right – “Time is of the Essence. Unlock Your Passion.”

Carnal Sensations: With a name like Carnal Sensations, can this be anything but oozing with seduction and sex appeal?  It is Playgirl DVD, after all…

A Man With A Maid – Tales Of Victorian Lust: This Sweet Sinner flick by director Nica Noelle is a little less chock full of soft focus sensuality than the rest of this list, but totally sexy and romantic in a different, harder-core way.  Me likey!

Three Daughters: Candida Royalle was one of the first folks to make sensual porn, back in the 1980s when she began Femme Productions.  And not that they must exist together, but she also was the first pornographer to make movies specifically for women.  Whether it’s the parent’s rekindling their love, or the daughters just finding their sexual selves, this movie is packed with passion! Check it out!

Life, Love, Lust:  Everything Erika Lust touches is amazingly sexy, passionate and super duper hot.  This award-winning three scene masterpiece is seriously one to watch, trust me on this!

Engorged is right!

xoxo
-JD

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Welcome back to our scene-by-scene review of Tristan Taormino’s latest installment of Rough Sex – Adriana’s Dangerous Mind.  Featuring all Adriana Nicole, all the time, this awesome fuck fest is a little different than your standard porno, as each and every person she fucks is someone she’s specifically asked to get busy with on camera.  Taormino makes her dreams come true, and we get the honor of watching Adriana Nicole get fucked six ways til Sunday!  And speaking of six, here we are at the sixth scene of this fantastic movie – a shower scene with none other than star Evan Stone!

While the scene starts with more ball sack/face contact than I would ever need to see, I love how hard Stone is with Adriana, keeping up with the awesomely rough theme of the movie.  He plows his long cock in to her mouth and makes sure to talk as dirty as possible, all while spitting on her and finally pounding that dick straight into Adrianna’s waiting holes.

Sure it’s rough and he’s mean, but don’t for one minute think that this scene is degrading or that Adriana isn’t enjoying every second of it.  It’s her fantasy, after all.  And sometimes hard and mean is exactly the way to show a lady just how much you really care.  Not that I know from personal experience…

While it has nothing to do with the scene, I will say that it still surprises me to see Evan Stone with short hair.  I know it’s been a while since he cut his once signature long locks, but for some reason whenever I see his name, I expect golden strands to be flowing down his back, and alas, he is a short-haired man these days.

Also, I do want to make a small note on Adriana’s appearance as well in this scene.  By now, this is the fourth dude she’s taken in this locker room.  Whether or not this happened in succession in real life, or was just edited to look that way, by the end of this scene, Adriana looks done FUCKED.  I don’t know about you, but when I get action, I want to look like I have.  I mean, it’s my belief that if your hair isn’t even a little mussed up, you aren’t having the most fun you could be – and by the looks of that measurement, Adriana is having the time of her life.  I LOVE that she looks sex worn and like her brains have been fucked out like a champ.  Yes, some stars keep the hair and makeup perfect from start to finish, but for me, that’s unnecessary.  I’d rather see real passion and real fun with the resulting real fuck nest atop the head and smeared mascara.  Thank you Adrianna Nicole!

Another quality scene from one hell of a movie!

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Last Tuesday we presented our top 2011 AVN Award predictions, where three out of five guesses turned out to be correct!  Now that the awards have come and gone, we wanted to give a little extra love to the winning movies that topped our lists this year!

Our Top Five 2011 AVN Winners!

Batman XXX: A Porn Parody: This awesome parody took the 2011 AVNs by storm and came away with seven wins, including Best Parody-Comedy! Bursting with top-notch stars from start to finish (including Evan Stone, Dale Dabone, Tori Black, Kimberly Kane and more!), this spoof of the original 1960′s Batman totally brings a POW! BANG! and BOOM! to the dirty movie industry.

An Open Invitation: A Real Swinger’s Party In San Francisco: Starting off as a scripted, plot-heavy porno, this flick follows an in-a-rut couple (James Deen and India Summer – who tied for Best Actress for this movie!) as they accidentally stumble into the sexy underbelly of the swingers/open relationship scene in San Francisco. Once the story is nailed as firmly as all of its players (heh), the director switches gears and integrates a real SF swinging party into the mix, with non-porn people and industry pros fucking alongside each other. Of course the entire scenario was something decidedly San Francisco – the sex positive capital of the west. Seriously, there aren’t many places in the world like the city by the bay.

Asa Akira Is Insatiable: Not only is Asa Akira insanely sexy, she rocks the porno screen in this fabulous Elegant Angel movie that nabbed the Best Anal Scene, Best Double Penetration (Akira’s first) and Best Threeway Sex Scene!  Not to shabby at all!

Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Advanced Fellatio: It’s true that I have a total soft spot for instructional videos, but even if I didn’t love them, this amazing advanced blow job guide would make this top five round up.  Tristan Taormino can do no wrong, of course, and things get even better as you add Adrianna Nicole, James Deen, Marie Luv, Evan Stone, Satine Phoenix and more!  It’s no shock that this flick went home with the Best Educational Release award.

Buttwoman Vs. Slutwoman: It’s a battle for the history books as Buttwoman, Alexis Texas, and Slutwoman, Kristina Rose duke it out to see who takes the title of hardest core in this three time 2011 AVN winner!  Elegant Angel accepted Best Gonzo Release, Best All-Girl Threeway Sex Scene and Best Group Sex Scene!

Congrats to our big five, and all the winners!

xoxo
-JD

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The 2011 AVN Awards (basically the Oscars of porn) went on this weekend in Vegas and the industry is yet again filled with a whole new crop of fantastic winners!

Before we get into some of the top  accolades of the evening, we definitely need to give a special shout out to Axel Braun and the Vivid folks for their wildly popular Batman XXX: A Porn Parody!

Picture via AVN.com

This awesome movie won not one or two, but SEVEN awards!!  Their list includes Best Renting & Selling Title of the Year, Best DVD Menus, Best Overall Marketing Campaign – Individual Project, Best Screenplay- Adapted, Best Supporting Actor (Evan Stone),
Best Supporting Actress (Lexi Belle), and Best Parody – Comedy!  And director Axel Braun also won Director of the Year (Body of Work)!  Congrats Axel and the Batman bunch!

Other major awards went to:

Best Actor:   Tom Byron, The Big Lebowski: A XXX Parody, New Sensations

Best Actress (tie): Andy San Dimas, This Ain’t Glee XXX, Hustler Video

AND

India Summer, An Open Invitation: A Real Swinger’s Party in San Francisco, Kink.com/Private/Pure Play

Best Supporting Actor:  Evan Stone, Batman XXX: A Porn Parody, Axel Braun/Vivid

Best Supporting Actress:  Lexi Belle, Batman XXX: A Porn Parody, Axel Braun/Vivid

Female Performer of the Year:  Tori Black (for the second year in a row)

Male Performer of the Year:  Evan Stone

And of course I was super excited about:

Best Educational Release:  Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Advanced Fellatio, Vivid Ed

Check out the full list of winners on AVN.com

Congrats to all the winners and everyone nominated!!

xox0
-JD

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Man, oh man, have I been patiently awaiting this one!  I first heard about this amazing instructional a while back and was super excited, but once director Tristan Taormino posted pictures on her blog of Dylan Ryan and Mr. Marcus going at it (scene 5), I knew I had to get my eyes on the entire thing.  And let me just tell you – holy crap was it awesome!

Obviously I love porn, but I’ll also be the first to admit that there is an abundance of fake orgasms in the movies, which is definitely a boner-killer for me.  An orgasm is such so wholly erotic experience – both to have and to watch, and I feel totally cheated when someone fakes.  With all that laid out, I’m sure you can see how it would be even more exciting to me that from the very beginning, this Tristan Taormino movie talks about how amazing female orgasms are, and really goes into detail about the different types of orgasms and pleasure.

I know I say it every time I review one for her movies, but honesty, Tristan Taormino does such amazing work!  Whether you are looking at it from an education standpoint, or just as a totally hot porno, her movies are filled with chemistry, real passion and the kind of energy that comes with really enjoying yourself.  Taormino’s brand of sex education has you absorbing the info without even realizing it – or I should say, because you are too turned on to realize that you’ve just learned all this great information.  But it’s still there, even after the heat dies down in your pants.

I feel like it would be to my detriment to even try to pick a favorite scene in this video.  Seriously, all six scenes are packed with super hot sex and more real orgasms than you can shake a vibrator at!  From Katie St. Ives; surprise orgasm in scene 2, to Madison Young screaming in pleasure (scene 4), to Dylan Ryan squirting all over Mr. Marcus’ leg in scene 5 – it was all amazing.  How do you pick your favorite part when all of them have so much rich, amazing action?!  I guess you just have to watch the whole thing and see!

Note that if you are looking to turn it on, get off and get going, this is maybe not the movie you are looking for, as the sexin’ doesn’t even really begin to go down until about 40 minutes into the movie.  But, to quote scene six’s James Deen:  “Watching girls orgasm is so rad,”  so this may be the one to slow you down!  It totally lived up to my expectations and more!

Watch “Tristan Taormino’s Guide To Female Orgasms” now!

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