Happy Thanksgiving Week! We really can’t believe it’s time to celebrate that day of thanks, but here we are, doing up the blog Thanksgiving style. When we first decided to do a Thanksgiving Top Five Tuesday, we knew that the only respectable option was to do food porn! So sit back, stop day-dreaming about the feast that will await you, and check out our top five foodie flicks!
Autumn Squash With Savory Cock – Sometime it is the random, bizarre stuff that I love so much. This “cooking show” porn (yeah, that’s what I said) follows Mistress Ambra as she prepares a lovely autumn squash, as well as tenderizes the meat she has waiting for her demo. While the cock is still attached for about half of the 28 min show, I spent that whole time wondering when she would chop it off, which – SPOILER ALERT – she does (it’s not real at that point). Like I said, weird shit, but definitely tasty.
The Kitchen - More foot fetishy, than food focused, this flick still brings the squishy action to the screen with Stacia and Dita Von Teese dipping their toes into the sweet fillings of pies and other sticky delights. And really, what’s Thanksgiving dinner without dessert?
Daily Fruits & Veggies – For all your women masturbating with fruits and veggies needs, the Daily Fruit & Veggies series is here to save the day! While I do think it is super important to get your daily servings of fruits and veggies, if I was running the show, that produce would have condoms on it. Because you never know where that food has been and what pesticides are on it!
Tried & Pied – Since my favorite part of Thanksgiving is obviously dessert, I figured I would include as many pie movies as my heart desires, including this random naked lady getting pied story. She was mugged for her clothes and now she won’t budge out of an unrelated store room – what else would you do but pie her? Oh porno, sometimes you are so strange and awesome.
Hot & Spicy Nude Cooking – I decided to end the picks with my favorite of the bunch – a totally sexy set of cooking show scenes that end in delicious debauchery. There isn’t too much food-on-body play, other than a delightful scene with whipped cream and nuts, but honestly, I like it better that way. I can only deal with so much sticky before I need to run for a shower. This one is super hot and spicy!
Last week JD posted a list of our favorite movies that were justly nominated for AVN Awards this year. It’s awesome to see some of the movies that blew us away on the list, but I was taken aback by how many movies that weren’t on my radar that look super awesome! Today’s list highlights the five movies I had never heard of that I will definitely be checking out in between my holiday baking and present wrapping.
High On Heels: I can’t believe I missed this movie – I am completely in love with Dita Von Teese and would love to be the girl rubbing her feet at the end of a long day. This fetish flick features Ms. Von Teese in every single scene and I can’t wait to review it.
Fuck The World: With nine nominations, including Best High-End All Sex Release, this Club Jenna film was one of the most frequently recognized film this year. It also happens to have Jezebelle Bond’s farewell performance, which I’m sure is going to be amazing and I loved director Jack The Zipper‘s Razordolls.
Naughty Black Housewives: I’m not really into the whole housewives thing, but I’ve got nothing against three hours of hot and heavy XXX action. LT directs and stars in every scene, and I’ve watched enough of him in the past to know this one is worth checking out. I’m especially looking forward to seeing Sky Jolie ride his big dick!
Nymphetamine Volume 3: Nymphetamine is Michael Ninn’s new lesbian series and he’s maintained his incredibly high standards while capturing some amazing girl on girl action in it. I did have a chance to check out one of these earlier and if it’s any indication, I’m going to love this one.
Young Harlots Finishing School: Harmony films are usually pretty hardcore and I kind of love them for it. Not all girl porn has to be full of cuddling and kissing. There were a couple of films nominated from the Young Harlots series this year, so I figure I’d better see what these Brits have been up to in 2009!
Be sure to check out the rest of the 2010 AVN Award Nominations for any hot movies you may have missed. With the one billion movies that were released this year, it’s impossible to stay on top of it all!
Sometimes you just need a little sugar to really get you going. I, for one, have a total sweet tooth and when it comes to my favorites, candy and cake definitely top my list, right next to sex, obviously. But what about when you mix the two – sugar and sex, I mean. Is it all gumdrops and lollipops, or just a sticky mess? Take a look at this week’s top five tuesday picks and let us know if you think these sweet delights are more trick or treat. Read the rest of this entry »
Happy Humpday! Celebrate the mid-week with a little link love – and this week we are packed to the gills with everything sexy and fit to print. Let’s get to it!
- What a way to start a Wednesday! Violet Blue over at Tiny Nibbles posted exclusive pictures from the set of Voluptuous Biker Babes, starring the super sexy zaftig queen, April Flores. Almost as hot as the movie!
- And speaking of the fabulous Miss Flores, check out her recent visit to Good Vibes over in San Francisco. Swoon!
Apparently link love is all about out favorite porn folks today!
I guess after all that business marrying and divorcing the king of goth himself, burlesque queen Dita Von Teese figured the only totally shocking thing she could do for Halloween was to abandon her signature ’40s style for the night and dress as a ”normal girl” – meaning t-shirt, jeans, maybe a little tan even. I doubt we’ll even recognize her! I also doubt she will be any less hot than she is now. You just don’t lose sex appeal like that over a pair of jeans and some bright red lipstick.
I definitely need picture proof of that! Oh, and I’ll be sure to post it for you guys too.
Today was dragging until I read about this new commercial for Dita Von Teese’s new wonderbra line. It’s fun and sexy – but I’d expect nothing less from the stunning Von Teese.
After meeting a beautiful young dancer at a polo match, Prince Charles invited her to perform at Prince Harry’s upcoming 24th birthday party. Soon after, his staff explained exactly who Dita Von Teese was, he was presented with a world’s best dad cup from his appreciative son.
Perhaps my perspective is tainted or skewed, being a part of the adult industry. I know many people who perform, and I don’t judge them, and I know that they are normal people just like me or you (ok, I admit some exceptions, but really when you get down to it – people are people).
I’m also aware that Dita Von Teese has a risque past, from her publicly known burlesque dancing to possibly lesser known fetish modeling (which included videos in latex, lingerie, nudity, and foot fetish (including girl-girl interaction, risque!). The fact that she participated in a lesbian adult film(s), which from what I’ve seen is still very tasteful and erotic, if you want to start classifying this kind of stuff (I prefer not too, but for the “porn is so bad” world out there who apparantly set limits that naked alone may be fine, but naked and touching other naked bodies is super porno!).
The press must be bored as crap if this has been the top news everywhere, in my opinion. Honestly, I looooove celebrity gossip more than most people, but this isn’t some amazing discovery here. It’s not like a private sex tape suddenly got “leaked” and you’d never believe that the person in the video ever had sex in their entire lives… If you were to google Dita Von Teese before you might end up on here, or another adult site where she is featured, or even possibly a little site called Dita.net (her official website) where she even sells her videos!
Do you care if she performed erotic acts with another woman? Are you surprised? Do you think less of her? I certainly don’t, and don’t think anyone else should. All I know is bottom line – Dita Von Teese is fucking gorgeous hot, and god bless her for sharing herself with us and not hiding behind an uptight front.
Ms. Von Teese makes me wish that I wore a suit, drove a throw back convertible and had an Angelina Jolie type magnetism that even the International Queen of Burlesque couldn’t resist. Restaurants would close their doors to the public while we dined on sushi before walking the red carpet together. I would be photogenic and she would adore me… Alright, anyone who knows me is aware that I’d much rather have that sushi at home and that I’m not one to get dressed up, but this is the type of extreme reaction one has to the fabulous Dita Von Teese. Marquis Media has put out a new compilation of footage she’s shot with them that includes “several unreleased scenes.” Obviously, I enjoyed it. You’ll see lots of legs, high heels, gorgeous corsets and plenty of porcelain skin. There’s also some light bondage stuff throughout, but I personally prefer watching her polish her high heels. Foot fetishists, burlesque fans, and anyone who appreciates a beautiful woman will enjoy.
-The Porn Librarian
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