Tag Archives: cops

The Authentic Lesbian Review: Cops Gone Wild

Cops Gone Wild CoverFan favorite Lily Cade is back in action as Officer Cade in a HotMoviesforHer exclusive and it is glorious! L.A.’s most corrupt law enforcer is in full effect and taking no days off, vowing to keep the streets we hold so dear to our hearts safe from crime with her legendary chase downs, house calls, and of course my personal favorite, the cavity searches! There’s nothing like spending a day with OC, and from the very beginning you’ll be entertained by everything from her going on and on about paper work and how she doesn’t lose it, to the FBI launching an internal affairs investigation into her methods, and the handy cam camera work that makes you feel like you’re watching a real episode of COPS. I know I’m completely biased being the huge Officer Cade fan girl that I am (how could you not be after watching Fuck The Police!?), but seriously, the awesomeness was not spared on this one.

Scene 1 – Lily Cade & Bella Rossi

1

Immediately Officer Cade starts spitting the using rhetoric about how TV glorifies the job when really it isn’t that glamorous, how a majority of it is paperwork (I come from a family of police officers and I can assure you this complaint is real), and how she’s nothing but dedicated to keeping the public safe from crime. I’m already eating this bullshit like a bowl of fruity pebbles on a Saturday morning, but my favorite is when she claims to wear a wedding ring to keep men and distractions away. Now I’m no stranger to Officer Cade so I already know the last thing she’s trying to do is avoid distractions, but I’m more than willing to play along. As she’s laying out the list of offenses she usually encounters, “crime happens,” and Cade and an extremely out of shape camera person (queue the heavy breathing) are chasing Bella Rossi’s fine ass. Now, she was obviously doing something wrong because she ran and then briefly tries to bribe the officer of the law into letting her go, but without a doubt Cade breaks all types of laws in dealing with the criminal. She points out a no trespassing sign and decides that’s what she’s going to book Bella on, but not before telling her to strip so she can be searched for “other crimes.”

3

Of course, assuming the position comes after the clothes are fully off and she even made Bella cough. I love every second so far! As you can tell from the picture above Cade has more in store for this minor criminal. She starts fondling and fingering Bella and at this point you hardly hear any complaints about the search. Officer Cade makes Bella stand up against some rusted gate and begins pulling her hair while continuing to finger her pussy. The corruption mixed with Bella’s moaning is almost too much to handle, but then Cade walks out of camera range, obviously with something more in store as she says “don’t move or I’ll have to arrest you for uh…moving violation,” and poor helpless Bella is standing there all naked and vulnerable telling herself “do what you gotta do to stay out of prison.” I can’t lie, there was a moment of sadness but when Cade steps back in the picture, still fully uniformed, but with a blue strap sticking out of her pants, all that sentiment went up in smoke because shit is about to get real!

5

Bella apologizes for failing to stay on the trail while Officer Cade pulls her ponytail and pounds away at her pussy doggy style. I love how aggressive Cade is with Bella throughout this interaction. Rights are being violated all across the board so no sense in being sweet and gentle about shit. My favorite part of the scene is when Cade slaps her captive’s pussy and wraps a belt around her neck for extra effect. It’s obvious Bella loves every minute of Cade’s display of power as she practically begs for more, and something about the abuse of authority is a huge turn on…judge me, I’m okay with it. Cade makes Bella get down on all fours in the dirt, which was dirty and hot, and then Bella makes the fatal mistake…she kisses Cade, immediately bringing the unruly officer back to her senses and the entire ordeal to a screeching halt, and in true Officer Cade fashion, she STILL takes the girl down to booking to be jailed for who knows how long. Don’t worry though, Cade was “nice” (her words) and let Bella put her clothes back on.

6

Scene 2 – Lily Cade & Daisy Ducati

2Daisy Ducati is sexy as fuck and she brings a ton of energy to every scene I’ve ever watched featuring her, so I couldn’t wait for this one to unfold. Officer Cade is out and about creepily checking bushes on her beat when she decides to do a house call on a paroled druggie. When Daisy opens the door you can tell she’s ready for some bullshit, and that’s exactly what she gets. First, Cade tells her the place is junky (it totally is), second, she literally checks everywhere for drugs and ends up taking an unopened bottle of wine as a gift in the process, and third, she refuses to accept that my boo Daisy isn’t hiding any drugs despite turning everything inside out looking for some, so she sets her eyes on a big ass container of Morton salt. That’s right, Officer Cade is either convinced the salt is actually cocaine or she’ll create any excuse to violate a (newly) law abiding citizen.

3Before we get to all that rough sexiness you see up there, what unfolds is one of the least sexy fantasy cavity searches ever created. Our diligent officer is so thorough I thought I was permanently down for the count as she searched Daisy’s ass, mouth, and underarms…what the fuck can you hide in your underarms? Whatever the answer is, Cade wasn’t happy when she didn’t find it so of course the internal search is next, and this is where things really start to get fun. OC wastes no time getting her fingers all up in Daisy’s twat after cuffing her and again, the aggressiveness was just as nice as the fact that Daisy took that shit like a pro. Even as Cade is threatening her with memories of prison and cracking lesbian prison jokes while going HAM on her pussy, Daisy remains relatively cool, in character, and sexy as hell! The ass slapping was especially intense and the accompanying screams sent me flying over the edge with no brakes. Cade goes on a real power trip when she makes the still cuffed druggie get on her knees and lick her boots, but the non-sexual highlight is when OC spreads out a line of salt, snorts the shit and then is all like “Yeah, that’s Morton’s.” I yelled “no shit Sherlock” at the screen like I was watching a real episode of COPS. The whole experience was great!

4I still have no idea how this shit down here happens all the time, but Daisy ends up cuddled up next to Cade as the law enforcing menace decides to let her keep her freedom, but only on the condition that she clean her place up before the next house visit.

5

Scene 3 – Kara Price & Bella Rossi

1

Bella is booked from Cade’s antics in scene 1 and waiting on a lawyer when in walks FBI Special Agent Kara Price. Price explains to inmate sexy pants (yup, that’s what I call her now) that the FBI has launched an investigation into Officer Cade and her methods due to more than a few complaints from multiple women, including Bella herself. Agent Price asks Bella to explain, in specific detail, what happened when she was arrested by Officer Cade, and this is where shit gets sooooooo fucked up…but in a good, slightly creepy way!

3

As you can see, Price isn’t just satisfied with Bella explaining what happened with her words. Instead, she needs to make sure she completely understands exactly what went down, which means reenacting the entire thing. You can see the skepticism on Bella’s face, but this might be her only hope to get out, so she goes along with it. Price bends her over, trying to match Cade’s aggressiveness, and fingers her before eating her out. Bella gets on her knees and demonstrates how she gave Cade a blowjob, but this time it’s on Price’s clit and her reaction makes the scene incredibly hot. She’s trying to keep track of her questions and take notes at the same time but all of that goes out the window quickly as moves Bella’s hands to let her know she wants to be fingered and completely loses control of her body. Her eyes roll back in her head a few times and I can’t help but send my silent props to Bella! Eating pussy is a talent and apparently Bella’s been blessed with it because Price can’t wait to return the favor and get her hand and mouth back on Bella’s body.

4

Special Agent Price takes a minute to put her panties and pants back on, looks for form 72-A (paperwork!), and then goes to town on Bella’s pussy. She gets down on her knees while Bella stands, and there’s no doubt she’s a woman on a mission this time. She asks specifics about Cade’s behavior in order to mimic it and gets Bella’s reaction. Bella admits she came during her and Cade’s encounter and that seems to just propel Price even more. After she’s satisfied, she instructs Bella to get dressed and tells her there’s nothing she can really do for her (I told you this was fucked up!), but she can tell Bella is a good girl. She makes sure to throw in a “be well” before getting the hell out of there and poor, once again violated Bella is just sitting there with the I got played AGAIN face.

8

Scene 4 – Kara Price

1This scene is really just a confirmation that Special Agent Kara Price is a dorky work-a-holic who rarely gets laid because she’s more worried about climbing the corporate ladder. With a constant supply of chocolate to stuff in her mouth, she proceeds to tell us all about her fancy educational background and how she’s a medical doctor and all this other bullshit that explains why she was so damn horny with Bella. There’s no doubt in my mind she’s a nerd who’s had most of her sexual experiences while reading books. She decides it’s time to review the tape from Bella and Officer Cade’s encounter, and when she does the freak is immediately let loose! She can’t keep her hands off her body and after watching how Cade used the belt on Bella, she grabs it out of the evidence bag and rubs it against her clit before inserting it into her pussy and later wrapping it around her own neck.

3

Solo is solo, so there isn’t really much to describe action-wise with this scene, but the energy Price brings along with her freakiness is amazing! She stays in character and sells the hell out of it while keeping the sex appeal alive. At one point she turns over and puts one leg in the air, putting that nice ass on display, and spanks herself with the belt before fingering herself into another orgasm. After regaining her composure, she makes a phone call and asks for a favor from one of her co-workers. She wants a flashy car, something really over the top, that’ll get her noticed by Cade. Of course her colleague thinks she’s trying to bait and catch Cade, which she is, but definitely not to put her in jail or punish her in any way. The smirk she gives at the end makes me hope there’s a part 2!

5

Watch Cops Gone Wild right here and let us know what you think in the comments below. Until next time follow me on Twitter @authenticlezz1 and the gal gang @hotmoviesforher!

The Authentic Lesbian Review: Fuck The Police

Fuck the Police BoxcoverThis week I found myself in the same position my colleague Judy Hologram found herself in a week and a half ago. I got assigned Lily Cade’s Fuck The Police! Judy girl, you were right. It took me FOREVER! To be fair, I saw this one come in, and my mind was already made up to watch it, so this is somewhat of a bonus for me. But the thin line between deadline and porno flick review is not always an easy one to walk, especially when one is as dedicated to their craft as myself!

Fuck The Police is a sexy, crazy, hot, and hilarious movie. Coming straight out of the mind of Lily Cade, this one keeps you invested from the opening credits. You learn right away that Lily’s character, Officer Cade, is a huge asshole, and I mean that with nothing but love and admiration. She’s a cool, horny, dirty cop and for a while she’s on top of the corrupt world she loves so much. We get a pretty dope quote 5:20 in where Cade is persuading her rookie partner Officer Ryan, played by Jessica Ryan, that the mansion hills of L.A. are crime ridden streets. She mentions drugs, prostitution, and porn, which is legal, but “they’re technically supposed to wear condoms, but do I look like the fucking dick police to you?” followed up by an epic douche laugh. That tickled my political porno side just enough and set up our first piece of action perfectly.

Scene 1 – Lily Cade & Jenna Sativa

Officers Cade and Ryan spot a familiar by the name of Elena, played by Jenna Sativa, and immediately stop her, requesting to check her purse. They take her in, but Cade has something special in mind. After sending the do good Ryan back to the car to play “bitch-cop,” Cade and her prisoner get straight to it. We get some hot making out, mixed with your fairly basic clit stimulation and then Cade pulls out her nightstick! Sativa definitely agrees with this move as evident from her moans and cries for more. Cade is strapped up under her uniform (which does look hot on her) and from here things get turned up a notch. Both of these gorgeous hornballs do an amazing job at illustrating why strap-ons are so much fun! Since the scene takes place in a garage of sorts, you’d think they’d be slightly limited in positions, but it’s the exact opposite. They get it in doggy style, standing, and missionary before Cade picks Sativa up and fucks her upright. You can tell Cade was on a mission when it came to hitting that pussy. She’s relentless in her pursuit to make her conquest cum and from the sounds of things she does a damn good job. My favorite part of the scene comes at 31:24 while Sativa is lying on her back getting fucked by the still fully clothed Officer of the law. As Cade attempts to reposition the criminal, she takes an accidental kick to the head by wedge heels. I love love love that she made it a part of the scene by acknowledging it. When Sativa chuckles and says sorry, Cade responds “You better be. Get the fuck up on the table.” You just can’t plan awesomeness like that and the raw humor in it, even during pleasure time, is a nice touch. The two continue to hit every position in the Kama Sutra until the crime has been rectified and then you realize Officer Ryan has only been a few feet away annoyingly suffering through this act of corruption the entire time. Fed up with her superior already, Ryan decides to book the satisfied criminal even though Cade has already “worked things out.” Now we have drama!

Scene 2 – Missy Martinez & Jenna Ashley

Meet Mama! Played by the absolutely gorgeous Latina Missy Martinez, Mama is the kingpin and brains of an illegal organization. It’s not quite clear what Mama and her gang are into, but I have a feeling it’s a little of everything. Her entertainment for the night, Jenna Ashley, is giving her a lap dance that quickly turns into a fuck fest. The kingpin mentality takes over during the sex to further enhance Martinez’s character and Jenna Ashley is so fucking hot that I caught myself just staring at her. I found the tattoo on her waist absolutely intoxicating and her natural tits are perfect! Both ladies live up to their reputations. The cunnilingus in this scene is my favorite throughout the flick. Attention to detail when you’re down there is key, and it’s obvious they know what they’re doing. When all is said and done, Mama’s girlfriend Carmen (told you…DRAMA) walks in. This clearly isn’t the first time she’s caught her boss lady messing around, but business still comes first and word on the street is that Officer Cade’s new rookie partner just took Elena downtown despite the previous arrangement with the gang of lesbian criminals. The plot thickens…

Scene 3 – Jessica Ryan & Vanessa Veracruz

Carmen, played by the ever so sexy Vanessa Veracruz, is instructed by her unfaithful girlfriend Mama to bring Ryan to their “headquarters” which is fittingly Mama’s bedroom. There’s an epic montage before Carmen exists of Cade indulging in all her criminal glory while wearing her uniform. She’s counting dough stacks while motor boating two chicks, snorting coke off a babe’s naked ass…can it get any better!? Those 9 seconds is worth watching all by itself, which I did while cracking up about 4 times.

Snap back to reality, it’s time for Carmen to put a plan in motion. She finds the down and out tipsy Officer Ryan hanging out at a cop bar and works her charm. There have been countless nights where I’m chilling at the bar hoping a hot girl tries to pick me up, so watching Veracruz flirt and entice the young Ryan was a turn on itself. She listens to Ryan bitch and moan and offers the only reasonable solution…getting out of there and going back to Ryan’s place to fuck! Seems legit to me. Now, it’s important to remember the task at hand. Bring the new law enforcer to Mama. Carmen though, wants some revenge on the side for Mama’s little “entertainment” and she goes at Ryan full speed. This is another one where no toys are used and I love the decision. The curves in this scene had me pulling the emergency break a few times! Ryan and Veracruz have beautiful bodies complimented by two of the prettiest pussies I’ve ever seen. They know it too, flaunting their asses high in the air while eating each other out, and showing off their boobs! When Ryan rides Veracruz’s face until she cums…Dear Lord YES! I won’t even spoil it, that’s a must see! Carmen hasn’t forgotten why she’s there though, and after multiple orgasms she picks up a lamp and knocks the still naked rookie upside her head (Is it wrong that that was hot??). Little does she know, Cade has been listening over an accidentally picked up phone the entire time and realizes something is up.

Scene 4 – Lily Cade & Jess Gatsby

The moment we’ve all been waiting for is finally here! As advertised, Cade takes her “first (fake) dick!” When she shows up to rescue her rookie partner, she’s greeted by Mama and Carter, played by the incredibly cool Jess Gatsby (fun fact: Gatsby and Cade are dating in real life). Carter is the muscle behind the brains and it’s time to flex. Although Cade tried to stop Ryan from taking Elena down to central booking, Mama feels that she still has to pay and what better way to pay than to be on the receiving end of what she usually dishes out. Appearing a little hesitant at first, Cade goes HAM on Carter’s strap-on after Mama exits. This may be her first time on camera, but that girl has skills! I think you actually hear more moaning coming from Gatsby while Cade rides her than you do from Cade herself, and the energy she brings to the scene sets it apart from the rest. It’s fair to say she knew people would be looking at this performance specifically and she definitely let us see a different side of her. The arc in her back drove me crazy the entire scene btw! She owns the “taking it” role, but midway through the action Officer Cade the mastermind is back in effect. She sees getting fucked as the perfect opportunity to sway Carter to her team and as a woman who has frequently agreed to things during sex, I call this genius! She ultimately gets the allegiance she wants, and a mouth full of pussy to top it off. Up until this point, Gatsby has played the tough guy role perfectly, so I was naively surprised at how much of her “girly” side we got to see. It’s tough to hide in such a seductively vulnerable situation like sex anyway, but when Cade straps up and turns the table on Gatsby *fireworks*. What ensues is amazing carpet munching and orgasm after orgasm. If this is what it’s like on camera, I’d kill to be a fly on the wall in their bedroom!

Scene 5 – Lily Cade, Jessica Ryan & Missy Martinez

With Carter on team “right side of the law,” Cade comes up with a plan to get Ryan out of this mess (she happens to be butt ass naked tied to the bed) and get back at Mama all at the same time. Held at gunpoint, the two officers persuade the kingpin that prison is no good and suggest that they could be bribed into letting her go with a warning. She already knows what they want but now being the underdog puts her in unfamiliar territory. She does still have enough wits about her to make a claim for her young runner Elena prompting my 2nd favorite quote. Ryan promises to “do whatever it takes to get her off” (get it) and gets a congratulatory smack on the ass from her superior. The threesome that follows is a great close out scene! You have Cade setting the tone, Ryan’s curvy body, and Martinez’s beautiful big tits. You’ll never hear me complain about that line up. Ryan face sits as Cade drives the fallen boss lady crazy with her fingers, until juices flow everywhere. Equality is central in threesomes and no one gets left out of this one. I found myself pleasantly bombarded with positions and tag-teams but never struggled to keep up. All three sexy ladies are more than comfortable with each other and their characters so you almost forget they’re still acting. Getting lost in the action is a sign that something was done right on set and by the end I was completely submerged. The constant giggling and banter was hot, and rookie cop Ryan finally getting her taste of Officer Cade’s pussy and fingering her to an orgasms was priceless. The entire scene is wild, raw and definitely a panties dropper.

I absolutely love this movie! The plot and sex are perfectly in sync and the acting was exactly what you should expect and get in a porno. Not Oscar worthy, but more than enough to keep you entertained outside of the sex while enhancing the actual sex scenes also. I bet the set was a blast too. It seems like everyone was beyond comfortable and the rest just flowed like water. Even if plot oriented porn isn’t your thing, you’ll have a variety of choices when deciding what to get off to.

Watch the arresting lesbian drama Fuck The Police from Filly Films now!

Google is Killing Porn, Sex Caught by 25 Cops, More in Morning Quickie

In HMFORHER’s wonderful home city, breaking news struck yesterday when a couple was arrested for having sex in a park — by twenty-five cops on bicycles. During a done-only-once-a-year bicycle training exercise, the mass of po po were just riding along when they came upon the two bent over a park bench in a baseball diamond. Good Lord there is just too much to say…just have a look at the image that will now be all the cops see when they sleep.

read

A daaannnngerous thing might be coming from Google. Though they are known for supporting gay rights and generally being awesome, could the company be advocating anti-porn for all and secretly planning to blow up the industry with Google Doodle lasers? Their blog platform Blogger announced that it will no longer allow monetization of adult content. In simple form, if you have a Blogger page and have ads featuring porn-related stuff, take it down right now, otherwise they are killing it.

read

 See now, back in the years of hell I, too, was a virgin, but absolutely had discovered how to get off. So it’s not that strange that Rebecca, a 22-year-old virgin won a spot for designing sex toys, right? Oh, well, there’s the whole thing that she had never even used them before and presented a bottle of Beyonce’s perfume when asked by Ann Summers executives what makes her feel sexy. Besides all that, she’s winning at the job, and therefore at life. It’s helping her deal with her untreated rheumatoid arthritis, and yes, she has now used the toys and loves the effect.

read

Don’t try Chinese methods to increase your sex drive until you read this article by Nerve editor Jeremy Glass. And after reading it, I just…wouldn’t really like to try them anyway.

read

In other news, it’s summer. And don’t hate me for pointing out the obvious because the next time you blink you’ll need a sweater. Season is short. Summer means the best thing ever in the world – acceptable NEON. And one of my favorite sex toy distributors, Pipedream, has some NEON STUFF I WANT. Grab one, and get thee to a beach towel for some action in the sun. Just not at a public park…

read

Gotta get a current event in here (bar trivia always has a current events question). Hong Kong is telling people of the world that they didn’t arrest Edward Snowden because the U.S. “didn’t know his middle name”. This may sound a bit “oh come on, wtf” to you, but remember that during a filibuster you can’t eat, lean, sit, or change topics, and you’re basically allowed to run out the voting clock, so, ya know. Politics.

read