Tag Archives: clowns

Clowns, BDSM & More: Dark Perversions 5 Review

From the mind of PornFidelity’s Ryan Madison comes the fifth installment of their Dark Perversions series. Dark Perversions 5 takes PornFidelity’s stunning 4K visuals, next-level costume and set design, and Madison’s signature rough-yet-agile fucking style and adds an eerie undertone that makes the eroticism behind dominance and submission almost spooky. If you have a fear of clowns, tempt fate by watching the first scene; being simultaneously scared and turned on is worth it!

Scene One: Lilly Ford & Ryan Madison

The scene begins with Ryan Madison dressed head-to-toe like a clown, but not the type of clown you’d see at a carnival; Madison looks straight out of a Stephen King novel. Madison is prowling about in an aggressive manner, and we soon see that he’s spying on a young woman in a flowy babydoll dress.

Madison as the creepy clown approaches the girl, who we see is the beautiful, fresh-faced Lilly Ford. The clown gestures for her to take a balloon from him. Wonderment eclipses Lilly’s face and, instead of running for her life like she should, she takes the clown by the hand and lets him lead her down a very dirty path.

In the bedroom, Ryan Madison does not shed his clown costume and stays completely in character. He manhandles Lilly in his usual fashion, but what’s interesting about this scene is the voracious nature with which Lilly is able to keep up with him. For every hard thrust he gives her, she’s able to take it and give him back an equal expression of fulfilled lust. While the dynamic in this scene is clearly a little D/s, Lilly can take as good as she gets. Madison incorporating the balloons anywhere he can in the scene is also a pretty fun, quirky touch. This is a hot scene and a must-watch if you can get past the clown thing!

Scene Two: Amber Ivy & Ryan Madison

I haven’t seen Amber Ivy in a minute, so I was excited to watch her be dominated by Madison in this scene. He drags the sexy redhead through the house crawling on her knees, collared, chained, and wearing handcuffs, so we know we’re in for a rough scene. Madison wastes no time shoving his thick cock down her throat and making her gag, but Amber can handle a little face-fucking. He alternates groping her pussy with choking her with his dick until she can’t take it anymore, then we see the breast pump. Madison applies the suction tube to Amber’s soft nipples and begins pumping them hard and swollen. Not long after, he takes her to the bedroom where they fuck like rabbits. Amber may be acting submissive in this scene, but she can ride a dick like a master.

Scene Three: Aaliyah Love & Isiah Maxwell

Aaliyah Love is the epitome of the bored housewife. Every day she wakes up, masturbates, pretends to listen to people, masturbates, eats, masturbates, and goes to bed. Going to bed is her favorite part of the day though, because that’s when she’s able to spend time with the man in her dreams. She doesn’t know his name or where he comes from, but every night she dreams of the same man making passionate love to her. The sex in her dreams is so good that waking life can’t compare.

While this scene doesn’t have the power dynamic of the first two scenes, it more than makes up for that in raw chemistry. The plot, as well as Isiah Maxwell himself, are very female-friendly. This is a good scene if you want to watch good, not necessarily rough, sex.

Scene Four: Jared Grey & Sandee Westgate

Big-breasted, beautiful Sandee Westgate steps into the shower, but unbeknownst to her she’s being watched on video camera by a stalker, Jared Grey. Jared jerks himself off watching Sandee soap herself up and down. When she steps out of the shower, she hears strange ambient noises coming from the other room. Naked and afraid, literally, Sandee goes into the spare room and is met by exposed lightbulbs and more scary noises. Suddenly, Jared appears behind Sandee and instantly devours her. The sex is hot, romantic, and _extremely_ passionate, which makes sense considering that Sandee and Jared are married in real life!

Watch Dark Perversions 5 now on HotMoviesForHer!

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ScrewberX Review

By now, we’ve all used a ride-sharing service at least once, but not quite like ScrewberX. Most of the time it works out really well, but there’s always that one-in-ten chance the person you’re riding with is either going to convert you to their religion, try to sell you some of their mom’s homemade goods, or try to take the longest route possible, even when you’ve specified your preferred route. Unless you’re in a hurry, you usually end up meeting some pretty cool people who are just trying to make an extra buck. If you’re like these lucky people and use a ride service called ScrewberX, you end up getting more than a chauffeur…you get an experience you’ll never forget!

Scene One: Sovereign Syre & Steve Holmes

First of all, Sovereign Syre isn’t in enough movies, so to see her on the cast list for this film was exciting. She plays an aspiring actress with 20 minutes to get to her audition. Her driver, Steve Holmes, is probably not acting in this scene. He seems so comfortable and confident that it’s not far-fetched to see him offering beautiful women his leftover breakfast, which he does to Sovereign. While this scenario is not brand new or unheard of, the conversation between Steve and Sovereign is so self-aware and funny that it makes the impending sex much more fun to watch. With the clock ticking and an extremely talkative driver, Sovereign is pretty anxious about making her audition. When the car breaks down on a “side road” in the middle of nowhere, Sovereign thinks that she’s going to lose her mind. However, Steve has a plan to calm her nerves. It is a little known fact that Steve Holmes was a very successful massage therapist in Eastern Europe before coming to the States, and his skills are infamous. Sovereign is hip to Steve’s plan, and acquiesces to his advances, but says it’s “all about me.”

Scene Two: Dana DeArmond & Tommy Pistol

I wish I was as ballsy as Dana DeArmond in a ScrewberX. She’s never afraid to speak her mind or tell someone to fuck off. Tommy Pistol plays one of those annoying millenials that actually believes in the “organic tea-dirt from Egypt” served in mason jars “pressed and made by my cousin in Vermont,” and all that hippy mumbo jumbo. Dana has no time or patience for Tommy’s self-congratulatory speeches on a healthy lifestyle, and she lets him know multiple times. Her driver insists on discussing his aspirations to become an actor and his life growing up in Ohio, where was voted “Most Likely To Make It Out Of Ohio.” During Tommy’s long-winded navel-gazing conversation with himself, he says he has an audition coming up with Dana DeArmond. Unbeknownst to him, that’s exactly who he’s driving! When he realizes who Dana is, he pulls the car over and insists on doing the audition right then and there for her. To Dana’s horror, it just doesn’t stop. That’s when she says, “Is there anything else that you’re actually good at? Because maybe acting isn’t the thing you’re supposed to do, and driving for Screwber definitely isn’t.” When Tommy insists that he has 10 stars on Tinder (which isn’t a thing), Dana decides the only way she’s going to get to the office is by getting her rocks off and making Tommy drive her. Tommy, shocked by Dana’s forwardness, asks if she’s consenting to the sex they’re about to have, and Dana replies, “I’m consenting to you shutting the fuck up and eating my pussy.”

Scene Three: Cherie DeVille, Layla Price & Chad Diamond

Chad Diamond is a religious young man who loves his grandma and proudly wears the sweaters that she gave him. Today, he’s borrowing her car to drive for ScrewberX and make a couple bucks, while also spreading the “good word.” Nothing makes him happier than doing a good deed and helping someone else. This why he loves driving for ScrewberX. But he has no idea what he’s in for when he picks up Layla Price and Cherie DeVille. These girls are wild and do not understand why someone why Chad would be wearing a sweater his grandmother gave him in 90 degree heat. The girls know what to do; they have to help this poor guy. According to Cherie, “he looks like those weird people who ride around on bikes and come to your doorstep.” Oh, poor Chad. If only he had a glass partition separating him from his passengers!

Scene Four: Dana Vespoli, Dana DeArmond, Mark Wood & Steve Holmes

We’ve established that most of us have already been a passenger in a ride-sharing service, but only the bravest of us sign up to be drivers. Check out Dana Vespoli’s crazy luck on her first ScrewberX ride! She gets a little lost looking for her first customers in an industrial area, but immediately sees them after she makes a turn a row of storage facilities. There’s no mistaking it; these are her passengers, and they’re a (literal) bunch of clowns. They refuse to speak actual words and communicate solely through kazoos, instructing Dana where to take them. Since kazoo sounds don’t translate well into English, Dana is frustrated and asks them if there’s anything she can do to make them behave. Suddenly she is transported to a white room filled with balloons and other circus props. At first Dana is a bit scared, but as soon as one of the clowns rubs his dick all over her face and puts it into her ear, she decides “Eh, what the heck?” and starts blowing all of the clowns, including the one with the strap-on!

Scene Five: Bonus Scene

Be sure to check out this scene for an awesome behind-the-scenes conversation with director Dana Vespoli, Dana DeArmond, and Tommy Pistol.

Watch ScrewberX now!


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Top Five Tuesday – Clown Porn!

With the news of performer Hollie Stevens passing away last Tuesday, we wanted to honor her memory the best way we know how – talking about clown porn! Hollie was one of the creators of the clown porn genre and we thank her for bringing this mix of makeup, wigs, big red noses and hardcore action to the masses.

This week’s Top Five Tuesday is all about what happens when clowns put down the fake flower bouquets and take off their pants.

 


 –  This Hollie Stevens movie was my very first foray into clown porn, and therefore my favorite of the bunch.  It probably would be anyway, as it features a rubber chicken as a sex toy, which is totally freaking awesome.  As random and bizarre as this movie is, with its sketch comedy/hardcore fucking mix, it really is a staple in the clown porn catalog.  Just be warned for the extra messed up ending.

 – What do you get when you put together scary clowns, sexy women, silly string and lots of fucking? Mr.Filthy.com, that’s what!  While only every other scene gives us some clown action, since the movie is more than an hour and change, it still feels just as clowny as the rest.
 –Sometimes the only thing you can do when you are presented with a bright red nose and a big rainbow wig is get your fuck on – and the ladies of Sex Clowns totally agree!  And we can’t forget the major plus of adding whipped cream to every scene.  Nice one, Heatwave!
A strange mix of clowns and pirates, this porno playhouse brings a whole lot of WTF?? to the table.  But really, would it be clown porn if there wasn’t a little added weirdness on hand?  I think not.  I believe this is supposed to be some sort of “PeeWee’s Playhouse” parody actually, with  as Fucko the Clown and a full cast of scallywags. Two hooks up!  (You know, instead of thumbs…)
While this pick is more straight up circus than solely clown focused, I could never, ever pass over a movie that offered me Belladonna in full clown face and costume.  If I did, I don’t think I would be able to truly call myself a fan.  We also get as a delicious bonus in this flick as well.  I’m ready to sit back under the big top and enjoy the show!

Thanks Hollie!

xoxo
-JD

Rest In Peace Hollie Stevens

We got word this morning that performer Hollie Stevens lost her battle with cancer and passed away on Tuesday, July 3rd.


We are deeply saddened by this news and our thoughts are with Hollie’s friends and family during this difficult time.

As Hollie was the creator of clown porn (what a great thing to be the creator of, right?!), we thought it would only be right to honor her by posting this amazing picture as well.


The world has lost an amazing person and one hell of a performer. Rest in Peace, Hollie.

xoxo
-JD and Ginger

The Worst Of The Worst – Sexy Halloween Costumes

Over the years, I’ve given up on the fight against sexy Halloween costumes.  If ladies are old enough (read: of age) to vote, they should be able to pick a costume without getting totally berated by folks like me that think they are lame.  Like seriously, who really needs a “Sexy Dentist” at their Halloween party?  I’m just sayin’.

I do draw the line somewhere though and The Sexist drew my attention to bunch of vomit inducing costumes on shevles this year.  While the whole list is hideous (the Spaghetti and Penis costume?  Yeah dude, that will get you laid. Ew.), there were two particular costumes that really got to me.

First:

Sexy Nemo... WTF?!

A “Sexy Nemo” costume.  Yeah, Nemo from Finding Nemo.  If that’s not seriously WTF, then I don’t know what is.  I can take Sexy Cop, but an animated fish from a Pixar movie, sexified? No thanks!

The Second:

Sexy Clown  - So Not Sexy

The” Sexy Clown.”  I don’t know about you, but like a lot of people, clowns freak me the hell out.  A “Sexy Clown” is extra, double scary.
The only way I wanna see my clowns is like this:

Yes, they are still horrifying, but at least they are too busy fucking to steal my soul with their evil painted faces and vengeful squeaker noses.  Ick.

This year I think I am going to be a”Sexy Bull Semen Collector.”  I actually bet I could pick that up at the local costume shop.  After Nemo, anything is possible.

xoxo
-J.D. “what ever happened to being a witch? Bauchery

I Never Pass Up The Chance to Talk About…

Clown Porn!!!

high five!

The makers of one of the best pornos of all time (read my review if you need convincing) are back. While I’m sure that nothing can top the perfect awesomeness that was Clown Porn, I’ll keep an eye out for their latest project Crackwood. I mean, how can you go wrong with a movie that stars Ron Jeremy, Gilbert Gottfried and a dude from the Love Boat (Ted Lang)???

Here’s a taste of the press release, but you can find it in it’s entirety over on xbiz.com.

The brainchild of Shuttlecock Productions director Chris Spoto and “Clown Porn” pioneer Dick Chibbles, “Crackwood” filmed in late November last year near Sylmar, Calif.

“The two-week production tells the tale of the final 48 hours of a dying town in the old West,” Chibbles said. “What becomes immediately apparent to the viewer is that the story of ‘Crackwood’ and her strange, funny characters is very bizarre. At times bright and colorful with an excellent score befitting a true Spaghetti Western, at times subversive, dark and violent.”

“Crackwood” also features adult stars Chibbles, Daisy Layne and Hollie Stevens who appeared in the original “Clown Porn.” Of course, several clowns play major roles in the film.

I’m super glad to hear that “several clowns play major roles.” Stay tuned to HotMoviesForHer.com for all of the latest and greatest clown porn news!

Clown Porn

Watch the Video

Studio: Ramco Productions Category: Clowns

I can’t believe that we’ve never reviewed this movie! Clown Porn is one of few titles I actually own on DVD and probably one of the greatest movies ever made. I mean, what could possibly be sweeter than watching clowns fuck for an hour and a half? Unless, of course, you’re one of those people who are totally creeped out by clowns – this probably won’t help you with that. Anyways, I think this movie is freaking awesome. Here’s a list of bizarre shit you’ll see:
Continue reading Clown Porn