2008. Ready or not, the new year is no longer rapidly approaching – it’s here. I don’t know about you guys, but 2007 was a real doozie for me and I’m looking forward to rebooting in the upcoming year. I’m not usually one to make resolutions (I tend to forget what they are about 5 minutes later), but this time around I am taking a stand and writing up a list of things I’d like to change in ’08. In fact, I’m recommending that everyone take pen to paper this year and follow my lead. Ok, seriously, I’m just looking for some support with this.
Anyway, I say we forgo all those lose weight, quit smoking, work out more goals this time, because though that general health stuff is important in its own right, I’d much rather resolve to have a hotter sex life in ’08. Gotta have priorities, people.
Here are 5 resolution suggestions to help you make 2008 a happy, healthy and hot year!
1. Make informed decisions when buying sex toys. Instead of just running into a store and grabbing the first vibrator that your outstretched hand hits, actually think about what you want before you shop. Are you looking for clit stimulation or something that is made to penetrate, or both?
Do you want a vibe or a dildo? And should your dildo be harness compatible? There are so many different kinds of toys out there that it’s a good idea to have a few things figured out – especially when it comes to materials, as care and maintenance can vary pretty drastically from one material to another. Going into a sex toy purchase with a basic idea of what you’re looking for can help make sure that you are getting something you’re going to like. Let’s make it hot and heavy in 2008 with sex toys we love! Here is a little help if you need a few ideas about how to pick out the best dildos or vibrators for you.
2. Tell it like it is. Communication is so important, especially when it comes to sex. One of the biggest keys to super hot sex is knowing what each other likes and what gets both (or more) of you off. Contrary to popular belief, people are not mind readers. How can you expect to get exactly what you want without letting someone know what that is? Even if it’s something that seems totally obvious to you, assume that your sex partner has no idea and let them in on it. This can really only benefit you in the end. I don’t know about you guys, but I think it’s so hot when someone tells me exactly what they like and how they want me to touch them. This doesn’t need to be instructional hour or anything. Dirty talk is a great way to let your needs and desires be know. Trust me, people usually listen when you get all breathy in their ear and give them a few ideas interspersed with moans.
3. Masturbate more. Seriously people, jerking off has so many benefits – including stress relief, relaxation, cramp soothing, and getting to know exactly how you like to be touched (so you can tell other people!), not to mention mind-blowing orgasms – that I can’t possibly understand how spending more time loving yourself could be anything but a good idea. I’m of the firm belief that 2008 should be the year of hot self sex and I think we need to be the ones to jump start the movement. So grab your favorite vibe or your good old left hand and let’s get a move on!
4. Get tested for STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections) at least twice a year if you are having sex with other people. Just in case, and more if you are non-monogamous. Not that there is anything wrong with being non-monogamous. It’s just fact that sex with more people = more chances of STI transmission. This isn’t written in stone, of course. More like a rule of thumb. It’s all about common sense with this one. If you are only fucking one person and you know they are only fucking you, maybe only get tested once a year or every two years. Or if you are having lots of unprotected sex, maybe every three months works better for you. It’s not really about your behaviors as much as just making sure that you stay healthy, which includes physical, mental and emotional health. Make STI checks part of your annual physical or trip to the gyno, which you should be going to once a year anyway. Let’s stay healthy in 2008 so that we can enjoy 2009, 10, 11, 12 and beyond.
5. Watch more porn! Ok, I’ll admit, I have an agenda with this one, but as someone who spends a good chunk of their week watching porn for both work and play, I can personally say that watching porn – both alone or with others – can not only make sex or jerking off even hotter, it can enhance your fantasies and give you ideas of sexy stuff you’d like to try. I’m not saying that real sex and porn do or should always look the same, just that we can sometimes use porn to kick-start us to think about what gets us off and how to accomplish that ourselves. Lucky for you, if you are reading this, it means you are already so close to a ton of awesomely hot movies. Just a few click click clicks and bam, all the good stuff, right at your fingertips. You really have no excuse.
Now that you have five fabulous suggestions, writing up your resolution list should be nice and painless… unless of course that’s what you’re resolving to increase. List or no list – be sure to make it a happy, healthy, and totally fucking hot new year!
Happy New Year!
J.D. Bauchery
