“Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.”

A British study has deduced that couples who sleep apart have a better quality of life and are happier together because they’re getting a good night’s sleep. Often it seems that couples believe that sleeping apart is what tears them apart, when really a lack of sleep can be attributed to mood swings that may lead to fights.

The biggest issue between couples seems to be snoring and that men are more aggressive in addressing snoring by waking their partner while a woman will try to put up with it. I, for one can agree with this as I sometimes snore when I’m over-tired and I dated someone once who practically slugged me in the back in the middle of the night to get me to stop.

Anyone who knows me knows that my long-term commitment fears lie in sleeping arrangements. I’m all over the place in my sleep, I need white noise, I like to be cold and I like lots of pillows. What if my one true love prefers minimal pillows on the bed and a hairdryer blowing in his face? (Don’t laugh – a friend of mine knew a guy who actually slept like this! Sometimes he preferred to have it blow on his groin and would wake up with burns all over!) Sleep and I have had a pretty serious thing going on for years and I’m not ready to give it up.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some nights when I love sleeping with someone. I think it’s the ultimate sign of true intimacy, being able to sleep next to someone (and wake up next to them with gross morning breath and no makeup to hide behind) and be comfortable. I love waking up in the morning in someone’s arms or falling asleep with my head on their chest. But every night? For all time? Oh, that freaks me out. Sometimes I just want to sprawl out. And when I’m sick, or my partner is sick – go away! I want to be alone.

-M. 

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