Image via Devil’s Panties – click to go Read!

Well despite the ‘blizzard’ knocking on my door, spring is fast approaching and with it will come my renewed desire to have fun outside of my house, probably. There might even be a desire for some of that fun to be of the naked variety and maybe involving bodies other than my own. So I’m about ready to get back to the old online dating scene in preparation for the fun sexy times I’ll be craving.

In the meantime, I haven’t been entirely idol. I checked out Fetlife, briefly (I’m still there – sort of – lot of reading to do) but mostly I’ve been playing video games and hitting on other gamers. Thanks to a recent post on Jezebel I realized that some readers might be interested in how to turn some of these internet connections into bona fide relationships.

My experience will be a world different from the WoW players on Jezebel and Nerve.com because I frankly – hate MMORPG’s. I am just way not social enough for that, so I play mostly single player games and RPG’s. This doesn’t mean that there isn’t a thriving world of potential hotties to bond with over character stats. It just means I’m less likely to be confronted with constant l33t sp3@king n00bs who want to pwn!1! everything in sight (they’re about as interesting to connect with on any level as a guy who can’t spell “you” on OkCupid) and the kind of gaming idiocy that doesn’t even believe women play.

So you’re chatting with someone you met on a gaming forum about your favorite characters and suddenly you start thinking – how can I take this off line and personal? Hold up sweet cheeks! Always remember to check for Peter Pan syndrome, debilitating illnesses that would make the boning impossible and physical attractiveness.

Peter Pan syndrome is easy to spot in gamer guys, do they take days off work when the next big title comes out? Do they work? Do they have no job but insist on owning all the latest games and systems as well as having the most up to date gaming pc known to man? If you answered yes to the first, might still be viable but yes to that and the other two and you’ve got a major child on your hands – proceed at your wallets, sanity and desire to ever raise children of your own’s risk.

Illness – well in the internet age the walls came crashing down and it’s easy for someone who can’t actually leave the house anymore to find new life in games and forums. Simply asking is the best way to go with this one, though you might get a clue if they routinely log in more than 10 hours a day. I’ve met some really great people who’ve had everything from cancer to allergy to the sun and even one who has a disease that’s making his spine fuse into one solid mass. If what you’re after is purely sexual at that point you might want to take a very cold shower but if not there’s no real reason not to keep chatting up your new homebound friend if you’re both already enjoying the contact.

Physical attractiveness – I make no excuses for gamers, we can be a seriously homely lot. Make sure you get at least one good current image of your hottie and give one in return before you start whispering those sweet nothings in each other’s chat window. Trust me, their mind might be gorgeous but there’s a limit to how blind you can be to your own attraction levels in bed.

Oh and one more thing, even after you’ve checked off those major potential road blocks – make sure they at least live on your continent! I happened to meet an absolutely drool worthy Scottish babe, who lives in Scotland! Insert sailor like curses here. All that flirting for not – I’m sad now, going back to OkCupid this weekend!

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