Photo via Jezebel

Back in December when I graduated with my sex degree, my mom gave me a gift she thought was fitting for the occasion – a glass penis sculpture she picked up in Jamaica during a cruise last summer… complete with an anatomically correct whole at the tip of the head.  She thought it was hilariously risque, yet had no clue that she had brought be back a souvenir bowl.  As in bowl you smoke out of.  That’s right – my mother bought me a bowl shapped like a penis in Jamaica.  How amazing is that?!?  I don’t even smoke pot, but obvi I kept it and display it proudly in my living room. 

I’m not even sure what the best part is for me: that my mom got me a penis statue or that she accidently bought me drug paraphernalia.  My little motherly mom!  I also find it especially amazing that she gave her dyke daughter a dick to stick in her mouth.

Today I hopped on Jezebel to find a post about x-rated bongs, bubblers and bowls, as well as a picture gallery.  I’m not talking about subtle phallic representations - these are out and out giant dicks and obvious vulvas.

And I smiled because it made me think of my dear old mom.

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

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