Welcome to our “Inside the Brain of a Porn Reviewer” Thursday post! These are stream of consciousness movie reviews that include all the weird comments I usually write down when I review, but drop by the time the post is ready to publish for all to see.

This week I thought it would be extra fun to review a movie that we were able to watch being filmed as it fed live to our site.  Back on July 24th, Wildlife Live streamed the second global live broadcast of the Screw My Wife Please!! series, with HM4Her crush Nina Hartley hanging out on set for commentary.  Little did we know she’d be pairing up with famed porno actress Kelly Nichols for their very first scene together, but lo and behold, they did.  And we couldn’t be happier about it. 

This week’s movie:

Screw My Wife Please!! 69 – Nina Kelly Girl On Girl

The Scenes:


Scene 1& 2

Basic Idea (so you know what’s going on):
From the description:
Kelly Nichols handles make-up for all of our performers. While doing Nina’s make-up, they were discussing some of their early experiences in the industry and Kelly comes to realize that the two of them have never been in a scene together. This, of course, piques Nina’s interest and the two of them just can’t help themselves after that.

- We start with Kelly doing Nina’s make up. They both have such cute dresses on!

- I love that everyone is so relaxed and just chillin’ out.

- Nina just said that she still loves watching people have sex, after all this time. Yay! I would be devastated to hear otherwise.

- Aww, it’s hard for her not to just want to join in. Poor Nina! I think she just should! Who wouldn’t want Nina Hartley in on the fun?

- They seem like such old friends. It’s really kind of endearing to watch.

- Ewww. Kelly is talking about how she blew a blood vessel in her hand because she was spanking Tommy Bryon so hard on a photo shoot set years before. Note to self: listening to stories about hand trauma does the opposite of get me hot.

- Oooh, so, no, they haven’t worked together before… I guess that needs to be remedied…

- I love that they are planning on figuring a time to do a scene together. I wonder if they were just faking and it was really supposed to happen now. Probably.

- Nina Hartley is so funny. “Oh My God, It’s a headline ‘Woman Fucks Woman of Same Age! Stop the presses!’” Love her!

- It’s so neat to hear them talk about the old days of working in the industry.

-Alright ladies, how much make-up does Nina need, let’s get to the fucking!

- Ok, that’s better. Nina untied the top of her dress!

- Ha, I love that Nina just called out her boob job. Not that it wasn’t common knowledge in the industry, but still, I like that self assurance.

- Nina really does have a nice rack.

- Ha, she’s worked with women that are younger than her implants. She is awesome. Hands down.

- Yes Nina, foundation garments do rock! A good bra makes all the difference.

- There we go, nipple licking! Kelly has nice, hard nipples.

- Yep, Kelly’s gonna have to redo Nina’s lipstick. I’m sure she’ll get over it.

- Nina loves her nipples pinched and sucked hard. Noted.

- Nina’s getting off face is my favorite. And the high pitched squeals she makes – swoon.

- Nina got her pubes lasered… she said it’s the best thing she’s ever done. Hmmm.

- Nina does have the prettiest pussy ever.

- Kelly knows how to touch Nina just right. Grabbing her pussy lips, pulling them.

- Ha, Nina slipped up and called Kelly her real name – Maryanne.

- Nina always looks so freaking hot as she gets off. I love that she never shuts up. Constant commentary.

- Kelly is just playing and squeezing Nina’s clit through her lips.

- Hmmm. Close ups : )

-Oh boo, they are getting dressed again. There wasn’t much hot sexin’ at all. Now I really wanna watch Nina Hartley get off. At least we have a bunch of super hot Nina scenes I can check out.

xoxo
-J.D. Bauchery

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