Sometimes a girl just needs a little romance, which totally explains why I’m reviewing “White Wedding” today. It’s funny when these cravings crop up for me, since I’m the kind of hardcore film noir fan that rarely has time for comedies (if they aren’t black) and never blinks twice at your average romance. Of course, porn romances aren’t average – they’re better!
“White Wedding” revolves around the heroine, Chasey, as she takes trip after trip down the aisle in a quest for true lasting love. Not being your typical promiscuous porn heroine, Chasey makes sure to marry her various paramours. Unfortunately, the first one she marries isn’t terribly faithful and after Chasey catches him with his hands down another woman’s shirt, for the third time, the relationship quickly sours. Honestly after seeing the way he looked at Chasey when she stepped up to the altar, I’m not surprised that the relationship didn’t pan out, she might as well have been wearing a dress made out of filet minion. Poor Chasey, every single one of her relationships seems to hit a snag after about six months.
Since her first hubby was looking at Chasey like a piece of meat, that would mean awesome sex right? Damn straight! The pair engages in a very steamy sex scene, immediately after she catches him with his hand down another woman’s shirt. Of course that’s not the only hot scene in the entire film, just the first of many. The second scene of the movie is a girl on girl scene that’s alright for what it is, not-lesbians pretending to enjoy screwing each other so straight guys can get off; nothing wrong with it in a fantasy sense, except that these kinds of scenes have long lost the glamour and excitement for me. Thankfully the movie doesn’t end there so we get plenty of additional sexy fun time. The romantic climax, when it comes, is hot and sweet wrapped up into one steamy little package. Thankfully for my less than romantic side, the movie doesn’t end there and there’s a not too nice little twist to the ending.
Over all this was a pretty sweet movie, without being entirely sacrine. “White Wedding,” the tale of one particularly hot woman’s disastrous search for lasting faithful love, punctuated throughout with sultry sex scenes and a surprise ending; really hit the spot for my romantic craving without leaving me feeling like I’d been dipped in a vat of chocolate. So it’s with great pleasure that I say I could gladly recommend this to many porn fans, though true fans of the sappiest romances might not be quite as satisfied with it as I was.