So it’s nearly Christmas and all through the studio, comes a demand for reviews of the holiday pornos. Santa was naked, almost everywhere but not a single Solstice debauchery was there. So it was left to the Grinchiest to find the Bitchiest, holiday nakedness…
Yeah I’m not the greatest poetess who’s ever lived – maybe I should have stuck with the dirty limericks – but I bring you “The Bitch That Stole Christmas.”
Things start off with a little girl on girl action which is a relief for a second there I thought that it might end up being a threesome that included a midget (they save that for last instead).The highlight of the scene was definitely when Bunny got to shake Santa’s magic snow globe – it seemed perfectly tailored for the bouncing boob lovers. After that the sex scene’s got a little random theme wise (something about catching a duck and winning a fuck) and Santa is uniformly drunk and crass throughout. Apparently Santa’s mission this holiday season is to find dirty little girls with his magic snow globe.
Surprisingly my favorite scene of the movie featured James Deen (I didn’t even realize he was in this one) and two brunettes dressed up like ‘little princesses’ having a tea party. There are lollipops and pink fluffy tiaras involved but after I got past the gross bit and the three start making out it’s definitely the hottest scene in the film hands down. Thanks again James Deen!
Well if you absolutely must have Christmas themed porn I suppose this will do the trick in a pinch. Just be prepared it’s definitely a bit more on the creepy/humorous side than the erotic tales of Santa boinking Mrs. Claus though.