Darker Side Of Desire – Is Submission Anti-Feminist?

 is having the time of her life falling in love with . From the very first kiss she knew that something amazing was happening between them. The sex is passionate. Their connection is strong. Cassidy has never fell this hard and fast for someone, but uncertainty is creeping around the edges of her thoughts. Many people may have insecurities pop up when getting to know a new partner, but Cassidy wonders if Mickey will ever fully accept her if he knows who she “really” is.

 

 

Cassidy is the thoughtful, sincere, and trust-worthy woman that she presents to the world, but in her mind she is living another type of sexual reality. She dreams of being tied up and spanked. Maybe she would be pushed to do things just outside of her frame of knowledge sexually. When Cassidy has fantasies about this kind of role playing, the set is always in a dungeon-type place, with chains and bondage equipment. She often thinks of a recurring couple having sex in this way. The woman is a tall blonde () and the man is dark and mysterious (), egging his partner to submit to his every whim.  Cassidy is afraid she’ll never be able to tell Mickey that she would like to explore this part of herself with him. She thinks he would completely remove her from his life for fear that she was a deviant.

 

 

To be fair, Cassidy is not unreasonable in her fear of being completely honest with Mickey. One night while Mickey was over at her house hanging out with her and her roommates, Mickey affirmed Cassidy’s suspicion that he wouldn’t be open to trying anything too kinky. The four of them were playing a drinking game involving sexual experience questions.  The questions became more personal and outrageous, and  asked the group if anyone had ever been tied up and spanked. According to the rules of the game, if you had done the activity in question you had to do a shot. Only  answered yes to Riley’s question. To everyone’s surprise, Riley flipped out on Gia for answering truthfully. Riley chidded Gia for being “un-feminist” for letting a man tie her up and do those things to her. Even though Gia tried to answer that she had actually felt liberated in her ability to freely give her power over to her partner (even though only momentarily), Riley refused to listen to Gia’s story and became angry that Gia would let a man treat her like that. Gia became visibly upset and left the party. Mickey seemed to agree with what Riley was saying, and from that point on, Cassidy knew that she couldn’t be truthful with Mickey about her secret BDSM desires.

 

   

 

The following day, Cassidy decided to ask Gia about her experience with BDSM. Gia was hesitant to talk about it because she felt very judged from last night’s discussion, but she told Cassidy about her relationship with an older Dom (who showed her the ropes of kink-play. Gia said it was a beautiful relationship and that she had never connected with someone like that before, especially in a sexual manner. Unfortunately, Gia judged herself harsher than others probably judged her. She thought she was weird fr liking it, and she ended the relationship. She had regretted it ever since. After listening to Gia’s story, Cassidy realised that she needed to be honest with Mickey about her desire to try new things in bed, and she got the address to where Gia’s old boyfriend used to take her when they hooked up. The space was a dungeon that was available for rentals. Cassidy asked Mickey to meet her there so she could tell him about Gia’s experience and how she wanted to try this area of kink. When Mickey arrived he was taken back by the dungeon atmosphere and equipment. While Mickey doesn’t say no to the idea of exploring BDSM, and he also admits he didn’t necessarily agree with Riley’s outburst the other night, Mickey’s hesitance is obvious, and Cassidy doesn’t hear from him for another week.

 

Meanwhile, Riley and her boyfriend,  are discussing a paper that Riley just received an A grade on. Riley argued for the empowerment of women by allowing themselves the freedom to pursue submission with a partner. Although, Riley says she doesn’t believe a word of her own paper. She was hoping to get insight to Gia’s experience, so she crafted a counter-argument to her own in order to better understand Gia’s point of view. Michael is impressed with Riley’s intellectual capability to frame her own counter-argument, and get a good grade on it, but he thinks she may not fully understand how power exchange works in relationships. In order to better understand this, Michael suggests that she tie him up and dominate him. If domination happens naturally in the patriarchal society, maybe their roleplaying will be rewarding and cathartic for both of them. To both of their delights, Michael and Riley learn a lot about themselves through dominance and submission play, so much so that Riley even submits to Michael. He even promises her that this type of game is just for them and their little secret.

 

 

Cassidy finally hears back from Mickey a week after she invites him to the dungeon. He leaves her a few notes along the path to the main dungeon room, which instruct her to change into lingerie and put on a blindfold. Though Mickey was confused about his own feelings at first regarding impact play, D/s, and other types of kink-play, he says he needed some time to work out what role this kind of sexual fantasy would have in his own sexual philosophy and feminist ideology. He came to the conclusion that if both he and Cassidy were willing and communicative partners there would be no way that things could get into a dark place. If both of them wanted to experiment with bondage and discipline, then both of them were able to handle this kind of kink with love and openness, and have fun learning about it together as a team.

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This blog is kept spam free by WP-SpamFree.