It was a bright beautiful kind of sensuous day when I picked “Bad Girls” out for review. The words ‘masterpiece of tease’ jumped out at me from its description and I just felt that a masterful tease fit the day somehow.
Ok, call me crazy but women who wander around completely naked as they go about their daily chores isn’t so much a tease as it is a misbegotten fantasy of the 70′s. Still the fact that no one immediately reaches for a crotch, a dick, or even a dildo is somewhat refreshing and intriguing after tons of modern gonzo wham and bam. Of course that kind of ‘innocent’ nudity only lasts a few minutes before someone’s getting pulled into a sex scene.
Old movies almost always have at least one very, uncomfortable, scene. At least one. For me that scene came relatively early on in this movie, I really don’t think that the Boy Scouts offer a badge for that kind of thing. Thankfully the girls had their fun and left him along the way. In the end I suppose it’s another reason why this film got the label “masterpiece of tease.”
Don’t get me wrong there’s plenty of hardcore fucking action in the film but there’s also a lot of voyeurism and a dash of teasing touch. The lesbian ‘experimentation’ scene was particularly sensual and unique. Unfortunately it was ruined when Ron Jeremy (a fine man and multi-talented performer but personally not my go to porn star) materializes out of the dark woods at the moment of climax and says “I’d like some of that pussy if you don’t mind.” That was creepy, Boy Scout Master gone all pussy crazed and stalkerific kind of creepy – I seriously think I have a new nightmare. Needless to say that seriously squelched my lady boner.
After the girls tell him off and flee into their trailer, Ron starts stalking them on their photo shoots throughout the woods – the very definition of anti-hot. Actually at this point this would almost work as a “Jason” type porno parody because I’m seriously more terrified than I ever was while watching a “Jason” movie. After that I’m a little too off put to enjoy the fantasy domination and submission that follows in the ‘harem.’ Thankfully Ron’s scene, when it finally does come, turns out to be nearly innocent, kind of sweet even.
After that I’m free to enjoy the plethora of natural breasts and lithe bodies in outfits that flutter and flirt but conceal nothing. I could get used to that. The “Bad Girls” theme song illustrated the point that this movie had no bases in reality. Hedonistic and totally unrealistic – thank goodness! Yup it scared the crap out of me for a moment and me being a diehard horror fan that’s not easy to do – which is also probably why I loved it so much. Totally fantastic, sometimes scary but mostly just really good humored fun, definitely something to share with a partner or enjoy on a lazy Sunday afternoon when you’ve got plenty of time to yourself.