Muse Massager in Pink by nsnovelties
This little guy is damn adorable. I fought through the urge to just keep the widdle baby on my desk to stare at every day, and had to give it a test run. Trust me, it looks cute but makes you feel pretty bad-girl good.
requires//just pre-charge it. it’s battery-free, which is heaven.
noise//< < < < <
vibration settings//ten. three solids, then varying. you change them by poking his eyes out! (you don’t feel bad, i swear)
Meet Muse! From NSNovelties… https://t.co/MDDYoO1emz
— Evelyn Mae James (@emmmmja) August 14, 2013
- what, what, what UP bath time?! (water-resistant)
- his eyes light up into expressions in blue led lights
- fits right in your hand (see vine), so it’s easy to hold for a while
- the ears position on either side of the clit for like, holy-shit complete attention
- clitoral-only, so those that crave penetration — sorry kids
- trying to push the eyes to change settings can get tough, and distracting
- it doesn’t come in blue. that’s the only other negative i could think of
The first statement I have about this little buzzy animal wonder is that I have never “squee’d!” half so much over a sex toy as much as I did this one when I received it. To boot, I opened it up, and was shocked at the size of it. It’s so mini! I love mini things! And by mini I mean that it fits into the palm of your hand. More on this bonus feature later. It’s so adorable I swear to the heaven heroes that I just wanted to leave it on my desk to look at all day, every day. It is a smile bringer, before you even turn it on! Gah!
Okay so when I got over the fawning and cuddling of it, I plopped down for a review, solo edition. You turn it on my pressing into the eyes. You don’t get creeped out for some reason, though now that I am writing it and thinking about it, I’m wondering, wait, am I just a sicko? I’m pressing into the eyes of a bunny. Anyway, this can be a little tough to do if you’re in the middle of getting to full arousal and want to switch it up. The left side goes forward in changing settings, the right side (this is as you look at it face-to-face) goes backward. So if you aren’t looking and click the wrong eye, you can get kinda “wtf” for a moment.
What makes this so special, however, are the buzzing ears. They are molded to fit right around your clit, giving it a happy little nuzzle of pleasure. When I go to use a toy though, I’m an everywhere, keep it moving type girl. Honestly, the ears allow for that, and in a way it can be better than just a solid shaft of vibration. But that’s me, I’ll leave the wand girls to their wands. I like bursts of everywhere on my muffin.
What I usually can’t stand is holding a vibrator and then getting numb hand. Doesn’t that suck? You finally finish and you feel like your hand could just emit waves of stimulation held in mid-air. What worried me is that because it’s hand-held, and your digits wrap around it, that it was a sure-fire sign of mastur-numbing. Not so, my friends. The vibrations were pretty concentrated to just the ears. Climax after climax, when it was time to be cleaned and put away, my hand felt normal.
This guy popped up on a Buzzfeed list a while back on Twee Sex Toys, and I giggled at the novelty of it, and how I shared my adoration for Muse with so many others. Then this one jerk commenter mentioned “does this girl know that these are sex toys?” Well look, I love sex toys that don’t look like a freaking sex toy, and it adds in my passion for it. As long as it gets the job done, then I want personal massagers decorating my desk in every form of cuteness and cool factor. This is so far, the best I’ve seen. It goes hand-in-hand. The ten vibrating functions get really powerful, or gentle, or varied, and I used them all. It charges via included wall port, so yay for that, and it’s easy to clean in that smooth satiny silicone finish.
My vine highlights the changing facial expressions by the way, so squee away, I won’t judge, I’ll join you.