Sex Toy Reviews – Non-Vibrating

I was so excited when I received the Cyberglass Felicity – I wanted to try out a glass dildo for about a thousand years. I’m a big fan of temperature play and the option of either warming up or cooling off glass intrigued me a great deal. Let me say, I was in no way disappointed.

I decided to try this one out solo. My first thought was how freaking heavy this thing is, but that is actually a nice quality once you start using it. It’s also got a few different textures that feel really great whether you’re using this toy for penetration or to stimulate your clit and vulva. While I really liked the smooth cool surface (it’s winter and I’m cheap, so it was cold) as I teased myself, this toy really shines when it’s inside. One end has a slight curve that perfectly aligned with my g-spot and the swirled texture provided just enough variety to keep things interesting. After taking my time to explore this toy fully, I came (hard) and decided that my gf definitely needed to get in on the action!

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Have you ever wanted to like something so badly, but no matter how hard you try, it just doesn’t do it for you. That’s how I feel about internal vibrations. I’m just not into that kind of stimulation, which is unfortunate because I really wanted to enjoy the Miracle Massager Attachment. I thought things might be different this time because I love the Miracle Massager so much. But sometimes love just doesn’t work out the way you hoped.

The Miracle Massager Attachment is a flexible PVC piece that pops right onto the head of the massager. With shaft and nubbed piece designed to hit your clit, this attachment easily turns a totally external use toy into a duel vibe. And vibe it does!

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Some people love sex toys that are shaped like animals or have adorable, cuddly faces. I am not one of those people. I prefer my toys to be a little less cutesy. While the Jellyfish dildo is, in fact, shaped like Jellyfish resting atop a post, with it’s squiggly tentacles coming down to form a textured layer around the shaft, it is not quite what I would call cute. It’s a little weird looking to be honest, but hey, like I’ve said before, once it’s inside your body, you don’t actually have to look at it (yes, I know this idea is in direct conflict to my first comment, but I still stand by not having cuddly animals in my junk).

Aside from the Jellyfish’s unconventional looks, I was pretty wary of its girth. At 5½ inches circumference, this sucker is thick! When I first picked it up, I though ‘no way is thing going to even fit inside me’ but alas, after getting warmed up, I proved myself wrong. The textured tentacles ended up being bizarrely enjoyable (the first and only time I will ever write that phrase) and worked as an added distraction from thinking about the thickness of the shaft.

Alls well that ends well and I ended up having a lot of fun with my new Jellyfish pal. And while she may not come out to play all that often, I know there will be times when she will be just the one to hit the spot.

Enjoy waves and waves of pleasure with the Jellyfish

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I admit that I went into testing this toy with a little bit of bias. I generally like my dildos to look nothing like the “real thing” and this cock was all too realistic, with it’s “Caucasian” coloring, detailed glans and textured veins (though the blue “veins” looked like awful prison tattoos). And I can’t forget to mention the fleshy feel of Cyberskin.

This was my first experience with Cyberskin, and while I was intrigued by the squishy smoothness and give of the material, I wasn’t impressed with the lack of firmness factor. I found self penetration to be really difficult as the damn thing kept flopping around like a fish out of water. I will say that penetration was not a problem when the Champ was wrangled into a harness and being lead by a second party.

While I originally assumed that the ring of the harness would go around the cock and rest on the balls, because of the suction cup taking up significant real estate against the harness, we found that it worked better if the ring of the harness went around the suction cup itself. This is easily done by squishing up the cup to pull it through the ring. Nice and simple.

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Let me introduce you to my new BFF, Bandito. Yeah, I know she looks a little bit like a starry-eyed hippie, what with her lavender hue and ethereal swirly patterns, but she is totally hardcore hot. And yeah, she may resemble a dick, but for me, she is 100% silicone lady lovin’.

With a perfectly curved tip and those previously mentioned swirls along the shaft, that Bandito did what no other g-spot toy has done before – I hold her personally responsible for my first ever g-spot orgasm. Way to go, lady!

And even though her head is in the clouds, my girl is totally grounded with an awesome concave triangular base that fits a hand or harness like it was made to be there. Bandito, I sense this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Don’t take it from me. Find your own friend in Fun Factory’s Bandito

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Great. My first sex toy review and I had a deadline. By the end of November I had to winterize the windows, clean the gutters, and convince my nerdy girlfriend to get her nose out of her journals and, well, in between my legs. Fortunately for me and the future of my relationship, the last wasn’t as daunting as cleaning the gutters.

I’m not known for my patience. Because of this, dear readers, you are getting a two for one review. I received the Celestial Perfection during a week when the aforementioned girlfriend was scheduled to work nights, and I didn’t want to introduce a new toy to the mix before we could give it the proper attention it deserved. This heroic attitude lasted thirty hours, after which I decided that it would be proper to take this new toy out for a test drive myself.

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It was time…time to try out the G-Spot Flexi. To be honest, I was not excited about this toy. It creeped me the fuck out. It was pink and bumpy…and when I took it out of its package, it was bendy. Not flexible, but bendy. It makes a horrible noise when you bend it, like some party favor from when your best friend turned 10. I showed it to my partner who looked at it skeptically, and after hearing it bend, placed it back in my nightstand. It looked like I was on my own to review this pink, bumpy and bendy bad boy.

To my oh-so-pleasant surprise, this toy is a lot better than it looks. Firstly, it feels nice. So many g-spot toys are plastic only, like the Bullet Wand or out of jelly, like the G-Spot Dolphin. I don’t like plastic in my vagina, and I’m not a huge fan of jelly (both from the cleaning angle, and the wanting to keep phthalates away from my inner bits), so this silicone g-spot toy was a pleasant surprise. I wasn’t so much a fan of the pink, but if you check the Vibe Review website, it is also available in yellow AND teal (which matches my hair)!

I bent the toy the way I thought would be best, lubed up, and went at it. Holy moly! It hit my g-spot PERFECTLY after one little bending adjustment! I left good, I like that it had an on-off button rather than the twisty end (although different speeds would have really added to it). With a little additional clit stimulation, I was headed into the sea of ecstasy in no time at all.

No, it’s not my favorite toy (which just so happens to be the Hitachi Magic Wand), but it definitely works the way it’s supposed to, and for the price? Hell, everyone should get one. A great beginner’s g-spot toy…just turn up the music or do the bending before sex, as I found it tends to kill the mood.

Get to all those hard to reach pleasure zones with the G-Spot Flexi

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It’s another pink toy…I know you’re all expecting a negative review, and a few comments about my negativity about toys of the pink variety. Well, SUPRISE! The Raquel dildo is probably my second favorite toy EVER (behind the Wand, and seriously, can anything beat that?) and is certainly my favorite dildo I’ve ever tried. The Vixskin from which it is created feels absolutely divine (and warms up to body temperature quickly), and the properties of this toy combine the feel-good benefits of jelly (but without those pesky phthalates), and the fabulousness of silicone (like being easy to clean). Rock on! Anyways, this toy is freaking amazing, and well worth checking out. Read my full review and learn more about the Raquel by clicking on the link below (or above)! It is the perfect size, material, and shape (and has a well flared base for either strap on use, or to use as a handle for thrusting, alone or with a partner). It’s pink, but I love love love it anyways. Oh, and did I mention that we share a very deep bond? My middle name!

Buy my favorite dildo ever. No, seriously. It’s *that* good.

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I have to say that at first glance, I didn’t think I could handle the Blowfish Love Balls. They violated two of my main principles regarding sex toys; the Blowfish were both pink, and had faces, which are generally big no-nos in my book. However, like the brave little sexpert that I am, I decided not to just a book by its cover (or a sex toy by it’s colored faces). While this wasn’t a toy I’d use to bring myself to orgasm, it certainly provided a variety of different sensations, and its cuteness (pink faces and all) definitely grew on me. The weighted feeling I had from having them inside me is definitely worth a try. While not to be compared to a vibrator, these balls are funky and fun, and would make a great gift.

Check out my whole “Blowfish Love Balls” review, and buy a pair for yourself, by clicking here!

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So maybe you’re a sex nerd like me, and want to furnish your living room with beautiful pyrex dildos in shadow boxes (and the sad part is that I’m not kidding). Or maybe you’re looking for a dildo that embodies class and beauty along side the main purpose of a dildo (and if you don’t know that, you’re probably on the wrong site). Either way, this beauty is among the holy grails of dildos. Firstly, it is stunning. Available either in clear or a gorgeous blue, this is a pyrex glass toy (read: UNBREAKABLE) with frosted flames climbing the sides. Next, it’s functionality. Sure, it can be used just like any other dildo. But there’s more! Like it a little cooler on your coochie? Stick it in the fridge before inserting it. More of a hot weather gal? Boil it or run it under hot water for a warmer feeling down there. And lastly, clean up is a breeze – you can even stick it in your dishwasher. It just can’t get better than that. There are many types of these pyrex dildos; different colors, lengths, bumpiness, etc, but they are all beautiful and amazing. So who wants to buy enough to outfit my living room?

Pretty up your collection with a Pyrex Dildo here!

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