I have for years and years heard from my sex shop working peers that Lonestar by Vixen Creations is the perfect realistic dildo, and in general I agree.  Not until being offered the opportunity to review it was I faced with the difficult task of describing how and why Lonestar is indeed the crème de la crème as realistic dildos go.  I’m going to try and do that sexy fuck stick justice, but if you want to know why it’s perfect – go try it for yourself.

Lonestar is made out of an amazing double pour silicone called Vixskin that gives it both the bodysafe properties of medical grade silicone AS WELL as the realistic feel of cyberskin.  Basically there is a firm inner core of silicone that is covered with a thick and supple layer of softer silicone.  The result is an everlasting boner that both keeps it up all night (or morning, or afternoon for that matter), that is soft enough to squish into all your nooks and crannies.

In terms of size Lonestar is an impressive 6″ x 1-7/8″.  Let me help you understand that in working terms.  It is short enough that I can deep throat this guy to the balls even though I have relatively sensitive gag reflexes.  But it’s LONG enough that when it slips into my puss up to the balls I think it triggers a little known reflex that makes my eyes roll back into my head.  ‘Tis thick enough that on that first plunge in I can feel the walls of my various holes expand to accommodate it, but ‘tis thin enough that I can ride on top for hours without worrying that I’ll wake up TOO sore.  This fucker is what I like to call a “full fit”- when you’re surrounding this thing you feel both like it’s a good fit and you’re good and full.  Hmmm- oh man, I’m gonna have to get that up in me as soon as I’m done writing.  I can tell.

Besides being made from great material, and its made-to-fit-most size- Lonestar is also a player that can perform in many different situations.  You can stick this one in any hole as long as you’ve made sure it is clean.  To ensure total cleanliness before going ass to vag or ass to mouth boil it for 3 minutes before playing with those second holes.  But since the balls act as a flared base you don’t have to worry about losing this dildo up you butt in a moment of muscle spasming pleasure.  Also, the balls act like a great handle if you need to grab onto something during solo sex or if you have a play partner whose hands are slippery from pumping lube.

The only downsides, as far as I can tell, are that you can only get Lonestar in “skin tones” and I love a good sparkly, purple, or green dildo.  Also, be ready to drop a pretty penny on this amount of hot fucking.  It’ll last you a lifetime but this kind of quality sextoy is not cheap.

Ok, I think I’ve gotten myself hot and bothered enough explaining why this dildo is such a good lay.  I’m gonna go give myself an internal massage and I suggest y’all give Lonestar a try if you’re in the market for a wonderful realistic dildo.   Yeehaw!

Oh Tristan Taormino, just when we think we couldn’t love you any more than we already do, you go and make a signature butt plug!  That’s right – the fantastic butt toy we are reviewing today is not only named after anal sex queen Tristan Taormino, it was actually designed with her expert input!

For those of you who may not know the genius of Tristan Taormino, let me pause for a second and give a little schooling.  Tristan is an author, educator, columnist, porn director and all around expert in all things anal.  This lady is downright amazing!  And awesome for us, silicone toy maker Vixen Creations teamed up with Taormino to create the ultimate anal plug – The Tristan!

The initial partnership happened a little while ago (not sure when), and now there is a second, larger Tristan, but we were lucky enough to get our pervy little paws on the original Tristan (which is now called the Tristan 1).  Measuring in at 3” long, with a 1 ½” diameter of the head and a 1”+ neck diameter, this plug is the perfect size for both beginners and folks with a little bit of booty play experience.  When it comes to advanced anal, I’d go with the Tristan 2 or something a little bit larger.

There were a few reasons we really wanted to review this specific butt plug.  We clearly knew that anything with Tristan’s stamp of approval had to be one hell of an anal adventure!  A big reason we were interested was that the specific shape of the Tristan offers up some unique features – the long neck of this plug really helps it stay securely in your ass and the rectangular base with the concave cutouts rests comfortably between your cheeks.

I was looking for a plug that could easily be worn while walking around and doing unrelated tasks, and Tristan definitely fit the bill!  With other shaped plugs, it seems like they fall out of the anus easily and even the gravity of the base can pull it out quickly.  The Tristan’s longer neck allows the sphincter muscles to hold on tight and keep the plug feeling snug – which means you can take it out of the house without worrying about it falling out!  Ask us how we know

Another major plus of anything by Vixen Creations is that all their toys are made of the best quality materials and most are 100% Platinum, which is the highest grade of silicone.  This means that they are easy to sterilize (boil or dishwasher), incredibly durable (with a lifetime guarantee from Vixen!), super body safe (phthalate free!) and basically just amazing!

Oh, and you can get this fabulous butt plug with a hollowed out base and mini vibe, making it an anal vibrator for only a few more $!  Silicone also transmits vibrations like a champ, so this is a total bonus! We didn’t get the vibe version, but were quite pleased with the standard model.

Thank you Vixen and Tristan for making a butt plug that is perfect for all the anal action we could ask for!

Well, friends, it looks like Easter is here… and boy has the lord risen!  At this point as a sex toy reviewer, I would say that all in all, I am fairly unflappable.  You want me to try out that giant cock with 45 different vibration patterns?  Sure, hand it over.  You say you want me to shoot lube up my ass?  Great, all I need is an instruction manual.  Basically, I’m up for anything. So when I stumbled upon this amazing creature on the free-for-all that is the Internet, I just knew I needed to beg them for one to review.  And luckily, the folks over at Divine Interventions were just as excited as I was!  So, what is all the fuss about?  Well, in honor of the impending holiday, I give you Jackhammer Jesus!

An amazing high quality silicone dildo, Jackhammer Jesus is a gorgeous 7 ½ inch cock with an impressive shaft that culminates in the most notorious of crucifixions.  That’s right, this toy is one part dick and one part cross – featuring Jesus stuck on tight!  Blasphemy never felt so fucking good!

And as you would expect from folks that would make such a toy, Divine Interventions went balls-to-the-wall and gave us a dil with the perfect diameter – a cool 1 ¾ inches.  Plus we get a nice defined glans with the kind of ridges you preach about to your friends.  Amen!  Every curve to this dick is perfectly smooth and slides in (and out) with great ease.  Add a little water-based lube and you’ll be on your knees, thanking the lord.  I honestly don’t know which I am more in love with – the function or the form.  This beautiful piece of shaped silicone is as awesomely orgasm inducing as it is breathtaking to behold.  Christ on a cracker, I am smitten with this toy!  It seriously feels like pure Heaven as soon as Jackhammer enters you ‘tomb.’

Along with Jackhammer Jesus, I am totally head-over-heels for Divine Interventions, the fabulously sacrilegious company that makes these toys.  They are a small, independent group of artisans that offer up a ridiculously fun bunch of high-quality, body safe toys and clearly have an amazing sense of humor.  Other toys they sell include the Baby Jesus Butt Plug and the Virgin Mary dildo.  How could I not fall in love here?  All their wares are made of 100% silicone, which is awesomely easy to clean and super safe for your body.

One of the things I love best about my Jackhammer Jesus is that you can tell that it’s handmade.  You can see the seams and where Jesus is attached to the cross, which I think just adds to the charm and makes me feel like someone really put a ton of heart into creating something special.  I received the marbled gold color, which it seriously beautiful, though you can choose from ten different colors, including glow in the dark!  Whatever color you request, I have no doubt that you will be equally as pleased.

You have no idea how excited this Jew is to celebrate Easter this year!  Fuck the egg hunt and the chocolate – I’ve got other plans!

Get nailed yourself with the Jackhammer Jesus!

When you’ve got a trunk full of sex toys, it’s hard to be impressed. When I opened up my latest treasure, the Nobessence Allure, I knew I was in for a good time.

This is one gorgeous wooden dildo that just feels so damn good in my hands. It’s as smooth as glass and perfectly weighted. From the picture, you can see it’s an amazing piece of art, but you can’t really appreciate the beauty of the wood grain until you’re holding it.

I know that the first word that popped into mind when you read this is a wooden dildo was “splinters.” I can’t imagine a more horrible place to get a splinter, but there’s no need to worry. Nobessence’s toys are insanely smooth and each is finished with a impermeable polymer coating which makes them waterproof and hypo-allergenic.

The finish is phthalate-free and forms an barrier to chemicals and bacteria, so as long as you clean it with anti-bacterial soap and water or a ten percent bleach solution, you’re good to go! As it turns out, when in the hands of a high-quality company, wood is a fantastic material to make sex toys from!

Besides looking good, I love the bumps and curves offered up by the Allure. I love g-spot stimulation and the longer end is perfect for it. The curve works really well with my body and the firm wood hits just the right spot. I have to imagine it would also be a great toy for prostate massage.

It’s also a good toy for anal play, although I advise you to be careful because there isn’t a distinct flared base. Between the bumps and the curved ends, I personally think it’s a safe toy for butt lovin’ but keep safety in mind and don’t push your luck! No one wants to make that trip to the ER.

The Allure is 10” long, with a 1 ¾” wide bulb and 1 ¼” wide bumps. You know your body best, but I think it’s big enough to satisfy seasoned players but not intimidating to sex toy newbies.

Overall, what you’ll get if you decide to purchase the Allure (or any NobEssence wands, really) is a well-crafted piece of art that was sculpted to get you off. If you’re looking to splurge a bit now that you’ve got that tax refund in hand, I would definitely check out what they have to offer.

Well, I can officially cross catching up on JimmyJane’s Form line off of my list to do by the end of the year. I’ve been enjoying the Form 3 immensely in the past few weeks and thought it was time to spread the good word about this rechargeable vibe.

My latest acquisition has a number of things similar with the Form 2, but is surely a very different vibe. One thing I love is that both toys use the same charger, so I’m able to keep both toys ready to go without cluttering my bedside table any further. Obviously, rechargeable vibrators are where it’s at if you’re trying to decrease your carbon footprint or just the type of person who is always running out of batteries.

Like its predecessor, the Form 3 is made from body-safe silicone, completely waterproof and offers multiple speeds and four fantastic functions. Despite the similarities, when it comes to performance the Form 3 is a very different beast. It’s shaped a lot like a tongue, which is a pretty good thing in my opinion. The motor is housed in the solid bottom, but the top half is a flexible, thin silicone touchpad that can be used to stimulate the body multiple ways.

Some of my favorites include using it to mimic a tongue (with plenty of water-based lube), using the edges for extremely pinpointed vibrations and placing it between my girl and I for a little extra buzz for the both of us! It’s also good for all sorts of not as sexy massage, but you probably don’t care all that much about that. Just know it.

The one thing that really made me lust after this vibe when it was first released was flexible touchpad JimmyJane features so heavily in their advertising. I’ve tried enough finger vibes over the years and this really seemed like it was taking the concept to a whole new level. Unfortunately, when I press my finger to extend the silicone, I think the vibrations suffer, so I don’t really take advantage of that much. I think it’s nice to be able to “reach through” and remind my girl that I’m there, but that it functions better in the other ways I mentioned.

While this vibe is pretty powerful, and the four functions add to its overall ability to make my knees weak, the vibrations don’t transfer quite as well as the Form 2. For me, this vibe is one that is at its best when I’m in the mood for a long solo session or for use with a partner. If I’m looking for a quick and lazy O, I reach for something else that has a little more power.

Don’t interpret that to mean this isn’t an amazing toy, because it really is. I just tend to classify my vibes into two categories: the first group will take me from 0 to 60 in the blink of an eye and the other are for longer play that result in deeper and more mind-blowing orgasm. Both are crucial!

I expect the best from JimmyJane and was not disappointed in the Form 3 at all. If you’re looking for a great vibrator that is well made (and backed up with a three year warranty!) and sure to please for years to come, I’d read up on this one.

Oh yeah, and for those of you who are looking to splurge a bit this year, Jimmy Jane has packaged the Form 2 & Form 3 together in the Win-Win Package. You’ll save some cash by picking up both and, according to their website, there are some shipping deals through December 14th.

Time for a little fun exploration and bondage play – there’s no better place to start than Babeland Bondage Tape. Really, please put the fuzzy leopard print handcuffs down and back away slowly, it’s for your own good, I swear.

For your buck, imagination, curiosity and freedom, novelty handcuff don’t pack half the punch of bondage tape. The tape doesn’t catch on hair, skin or clothing, so it’s perfect for blindfolds, gags and full head wraps – opening up your potential experimental range considerably, breath play anyone?

Feeling like tying your partner up but want an easy out in case things get to tight? Ever tried locating that tiny handcuff key while someone’s screaming their safe word?

Only rope and bondage tape will give you the quick release of scissors, but tape has the added bonus of being cheap enough that you won’t hesitate to go in for the cut (not that you’re cheapskates like I am, I’m just saying, just in case.)

It is still a bit of bondage gear I’d class as beginner and light play only; a particularly large, struggling bottom could easily pinch off a nerve or break free from badly looped tape, while rope offers the top a bit more control in both the process and their bound bottom. Still, while you’re exploring, tape has the advantage of sticking to itself, being reusable and cheap enough to toss to keep your playing conditions sanitary if you’re playing in the groin regions, etc.

The biggest godsend about this tape, besides the price, is definitely the way it didn’t cling to my hair at all. Unfortunately the tape might not cling to your hair but that doesn’t mean your partner won’t pinch off, pull out or outright cut off a chunk, so the tape still doesn’t save you from novice errors, but otherwise it’s the first must have I’d recommend for anyone interested in some bondage play, whether you’re just planning to stay a dabbler or thinking of getting more in depth later on. Think of it like duct tape: you really just gotta have it.

Get some Babeland Bondage Tape of your own!

It’s not often that I get to review a totally unique toy, so when Babeland offered me the chance to review the Sqweel I jumped on it. There was a lot of hype surrounding the release of this LoveHoney toy and I just had to find out what all the buzz was about!

First, let me describe this toy because it’s definitely unlike anything else I’ve ever owned. It’s roughly 4×4 inches of rotating silicone tongues enclosed in black case that opens for easy and thorough cleaning. The toy runs on 3 AAA batteries, which are included and has three speeds – pointless, medium and high. Basically, you turn it on the tongue wheel spins and licks and your boyfriend becomes obsolete…

After grabbing a little water-based lube, which is a necessity, I began my mission to find out if the Sqweel is really all that… I turned on the low speed and quickly decided I needed a little more tongue action that it provided so I moved on to the medium setting. This is when I started to enjoy myself, although I also discovered that if you try pushing it against your body for more pressure, you’ll sadly halt the action.

After a speed increase and some time, I ended up having a pretty sweet orgasm and was officially a fan of the Sqweel. It was a very different experience than I typically have with a vibe and variety is the spice of life! It took more time for me to get to that magical place, but it was a great journey and well worth it.

I do have to say that this toy is probably not for everyone. My girl is not that big of a fan, but she also likes a lot of pressure on her girl bits and that’s just not going to happen with this toy. It’s too big to really use with another toy and is just not designed to be smashed up against your throbbing clit.

Overall, I have to say that this is a really great addition to my toy chest. The toy is thoughtfully designed and definitely adds a new and unique sensation that none of my others provide. While I still prefer a flesh and blood human down between my thighs, I see myself reaching for the Sqweel a lot in the future.

Let me just come out and say that I have been lusting after Lelo’s Gigi for at least a year. I’ve read so many good things about this little rechargeable vibe and I super love Lelo, so I just had to get my hands on my very own! Thanks to Babeland, I can now cross another toy off my wish list because I am now the proud owner of this high-end vibrator.

I hate to do this, but the best way to start off describing the Gigi is to say it’s freaking adorable. At 6.5 inches long (4.5 insertable) it fits in the palm of my hand quite nicely and the 3.5 inch diameter is a great for newbies who are trying to get to their g-spot, not train for the DP Olympics. The most notable thing about this vibrator is head, which is designed to seek out your g-spot without much effort.

The insertable end is made from medical grade silicone and can be sterilized by wiping it down with a 10 percent bleach solution. It’s quite firm and very smooth, which when combined with the diminutive size and some water-based lube, makes insertion a breeze. The flatish head also makes it great for external stimulation because it’s really easy to focus the vibrations wherever you’d like.

I’ve used this toy a bunch of different ways already and see myself reaching for it often. Whether I’m using it for g-spot massage or clitoral stimulation combined with my Pure Wand, it’s pretty damn awesome.

Like all Lelo toys, the Gigi comes with a couple of storage options. I keep mine in the fancy black box that provides storage space for the charger underneath the tray, but there is also a white satin pouch if you prefer something that takes up a little less space.

My only complaint would have to be the control panel. This toy is operated by a single round button that has an X on it to help guide you. Press the left and right buttons you scroll through the seven speeds – the up and down buttons take you through the five function buttons. It seems pretty simple, but I have changed the function when I’ve wanted to change the speed enough times to mention it here. Of course, it is complicated even further when you factor in lube…

Despite that one small issue, this is still a really great vibe. It’s perfect for those of you who are just starting out with g-spot stimulation because it really takes all of the guess work out of it. I’m guessing those of you with a lot of toy experience don’t really need me to convince you that this is a great toy – you probably know enough about Lelo to have figured that out!

Get your own Gigi – it’s currently on sale but the low price won’t last!

Let me just begin by saying I’m pretty excited that Fun Factory has gone ahead and updated a toy that so many women have raved about in the past. The original SmartBalls got a lot of praise, but this company saw a way to improve one of their most popular toys and took the time to do it right.

I was pretty psyched when I received the newish SmartBalls Teneo Duo for review from Goodvibes.com. I have some Ben Wa balls, but never got my hands on the original SmartBalls. Since the Duo is crafted from 100% medical grade silicone instead of Elastomer like the originals, I think it was well worth the wait!

So, the Duo is a set of Ben Wa type balls that are designed to strengthen the PC muscle. All you need to do is insert them and then go about your business. The vibration of the inner balls will cause your PC muscle to work to keep everything in place and you get a workout that will lead to better orgasms! It’s really simple and equally important to do your kegels – everyone with a vagina should make sure to exercise daily.

The Duo has an interesting texture that includes a finger groove that is meant to help insert the toy. I definitely recommend you use a water-based lube (they include a sample) for insertion as they are pretty big. Because they are made from silicone, you should not use a silicone-based lubricant because it could ruin them. Once inserted, as long as you’re moving, you’re exercising! I have gotten in the habit of using mine after work when I go through my daily cleaning routine.

The greatest thing for me is that they can be sterilized by wiping them down with a 10 percent bleach solution. While I’m not sharing them, I use them all the time and I love the fact that I can be sure of their cleanliness every time I use them. I’m especially thrilled that the retrieval cord is made from silicone because toys with nylon cords kind of gross me out.

I really like the Teneo Duo, although they may be a little much for beginners. If you’re worried about that, you should check out our review of the Teneo Uno, which is basically the same item but with only one ball.

Do something smart (and sexy!) for your body with Fun Factory Smartballs Teneo Duo!

I hate shaving. I really cannot express how much I hate taking sharp implements to tender bits. In grown hairs are a plague, re-growing hairs are an itchy nuisance, then the decision – do I grow it back out or keep keeping it off because it’ll stop the itch? I’ve tried side stepping the whole shaving issue with waxes, but I get the same problems, in grown hairs, itchiness, for some reason I seem to be allergic to the wax, so I break out and it never seems to last a week. I moved onto epilating which works better than both shaving and waxing for me, but is about 20x’s slower to do and equally more painful (try tweezing the last few hairs inside your lips sometime – yeah my eyes well up just thinking about it).

So I’m always on the lookout for something to help me with my hair problems, always ready to jump on the next potential helpful product that promises to sooth or smooth quickly and painlessly (I’ve even tried sugaring – I don’t recommend it) and when I heard about Coochy Protection, I had to give it a shot. Thanks to my continued ill health (and the onset of winter laziness) I was sporting a rather thick coat of winter wool with little hope or likeliness of getting out the ol’ epilator any time soon, so I decided to put this soothing spritz to the ultimate test – shaving.

Shaving is quick and “easy,” done in a few swipes during my shower but usually the after effects; itching, bumps and that oh so pleasant after shaving open wound I’m trying to smear lotions and deodorant on, seem to last forever. There didn’t seem to be a harsher litmus test to put my Coochy through and I’m proud to say it passed with flying colors! No bumps or irritation (even though I discovered the old faithful razor I haven’t used in a year had rusted – ew) and no signs of a single ingrown hair!

The mist comes out super fine and lays so light on your skin that at first I over misted because I couldn’t feel the spray landing where I wanted it. There’s a very slight scent that reminds me slightly of a toilet water that uses either cucumbers or melon but it’s really so faint it’s hard to notice at all, even when applied directly to the pits. After shaving and misting, the skin feels slightly moist, not in the least bit greasy, though there’s sometimes a very slight sting if you do manage to nick yourself in the process of applying a sharp edge to your skin. After a few weeks with the spray, I’ve yet to feel any itchiness and the constantly shaved/chaffed/exposed skin shows no signs of needing extra moisturizer, in fact I’ve never been as confident in my shaved skin as I am after Coochy.

After my experience with this spray, I’m seriously considering going back to shaving instead of my epilator – it’s actually as quick, easy and worthwhile for me now as it seemingly is for people with less sensitive hairy bits. Who knew an after shave could so totally change my feelings on razors!

Get some Coochy Protection of your very own!