All posts by emja

Go Watch: Cosplay Queens and Tied Up Teens

POW! BAM! FUCK! Easily the porn queen of the Cosplay world (actually, you can remove the porn thing altogether because she dominates the scene even outside of the sex industry), Tanya Tate unleashed her own imaginative spin on Comic Con with this film. With tons of rope, cute girls, tight action outfits, and a speculum, this is a movie for anyone that enjoys the super hero lifestyle or lady sex. Sexy doll babes Nicki Hunter, Zoey Holloway, and Cassie Laine also star along side the buxom Brit, and their sex is most definitely on fire. About Cosplay Queens & Tied … Continue reading Go Watch: Cosplay Queens and Tied Up Teens

Go Watch: The Lone Ranger XXX Porn Parody

Of note: I never watched any of The Lone Ranger installments and have never been too interested, until I heard a porn parody was being released. So if you’re looking for connections to the real thing, look elsewhere. This is a review that is blind to the original story, and I was excited purely because of Adrianna Luna (who I adored in Tuff Love) and those period piece costumes. Watch the parody here. As far as plots go, the opening is actually pretty dynamic and dramatic, and sets you up for the story pleasantly. You have the prototypical “I guess … Continue reading Go Watch: The Lone Ranger XXX Porn Parody

AnyWHERE! With ANYONE!

(Well, maybe not that last bit)   by Ashley Rosemont   No, seriously, this article from the Guardian explores the notion that women are totally able to get it on any freaking time they want.   The article posits two nearly identical scenarios: a guy walks into a bar (see, this is how we know this is all kind of a joke) and offers sex to anyone who wants it. No takers. Because he’s a pervert. But a woman does the same, and is inundated with “horny suitors” as the article says, not mincing words.   Is this a reflection … Continue reading AnyWHERE! With ANYONE!

We Have Family in Canada!

Way back when, when it was much warmer and 37 degrees in Toronto’s October air, HotMovies attended the Everything To Do With Sex Show and made just a great amount of friends. Well today, we received a wonderful hello from one said friend, and an entire University class joined in on the greeting as well! After meeting one lovely student, we sent her entire women’s studies class our mini vibrators and plenty of minutes to use in our theater. Hey, our friends get pampered. Here’s the gorgeous group showing off our swag and their sexy smiles.

The 2014 of Sex Toys From the Best of 2013

2013 was my year of sexual toy revolution. I put so many novelties up, around, and on my hoo-hah-and-bits that you would think I should still be just vibrating…just sitting here…vibrating. But I’m not. Because I invested my time in only the most trusted companies and most desired doohickies. So what I’m going to do here is reward the best of the bunch and then review what’s coming from them in 2014, because VALENTINE’S DAY SITUATIONS are on their way and you best be prepared. Because, orgasms. And love. And lusty “if there’s ever a day to let you go in … Continue reading The 2014 of Sex Toys From the Best of 2013

Bigfoot Porn, Really?

by Ashley Rosemont     Bigfoot porn? Yes. It’s part of a niche market in erotic literature known as cryptozoological erotica, or “monster porn.” The “monsters” range from figures in classic literature–like Frankenstein–to mythical beasts like gryphons, hydras, even unicorns. But the Bigfoot conceit, perhaps appropriately given the creature’s size, seems to be the biggest seller.  Author Virginia Wade (not her real name) claims she is making thirty thousand dollars a MONTH writing sexy stories about the world’s favorite elusive bear-ape-man. During a “slow” month, she makes $6K. The novels have been translated into multiple languages (I am pretty sure … Continue reading Bigfoot Porn, Really?

‘Scuse Me, Do You Have Change for a Dildo?

by Ashley Rosemont     Let’s just say right now, vending machines are a wonderful invention. I recall a recent episode of Mad Men (the AMC hit TV series that takes place in the 1960s) where the office manager Joan complains that the new vending machines will make the secretaries fat because they can get a snack any time they want. Hey, lighten up, Joan, that’s the point!   It’s true, they’re a convenience we are often happy to see, and not just because they can satiate our cravings for sugar and peanuts. Vending machines that dispense condoms, aspirin, mouthwash, … Continue reading ‘Scuse Me, Do You Have Change for a Dildo?

This Isn’t Christmas Vacation for Featured Fuck of the Day

We know it’s a mind fuck — there are only nine days until Christmas. But believe it, because the halls are decked and there’s a fucking Christmas Vacation Porn Parody out there. It was released in 2010 and doesn’t really star anyone I quite know (also Melanie Rios totally does a double-take likeness to Farrah Abraham), but it’s a parody of one of the best holiday movies ever made so it’s worth a watch. HOWEVER, as one of our previous editors mentioned, don’t ever associate this is National Lampoon and their snot-out-your-nose comedy. This is fuck-to-suck scenes with no real … Continue reading This Isn’t Christmas Vacation for Featured Fuck of the Day

Go Play: Fantasy Vibe by Blush Novelties

  blank mini skinny This noisy little pet will get the job done, and quickly. The see-thru aspect will appeal to your 90s kitsch, but the length, size, and flexibility will appeal to your baby bits. requires//two AA batteries noise//< < < < < vibration settings//increasing. as you turn the knob the toy gradually gets stronger, no settings.       blank  yay! waterproof, so get funky in the shower multi-speed through knob, not buttons flexible translucent for that 90s charm     damn. pretty noisy; not discreet multi-speed through knob, not buttons (could go either way) blanks in full Visually this … Continue reading Go Play: Fantasy Vibe by Blush Novelties

Predicting the Sex Toys of 2014

We’ve got some weird shit ahead of us, ladies of the orgasms. Now, I’m no Epiphora, but my job entails that I keep on the up and up regarding sex toys and wheeeee tools. All I can say is, the emails are coming in and the pussy play things aren’t just vibrators. Here’s a look at some of the releases just launched or are coming out, and my predictions (through them) for the sex toys of 2014.   The Lelo Ida   This is the toy version of attending a rave. It spins and it spins and it pulses and … Continue reading Predicting the Sex Toys of 2014