Recently I attended a party at an Altadena art gallery. A good friend of mine was bartending the event, and when I arrived he introduced me to his sister, Laura. Laura’s dress and hair was new-age bohemian chic, and she immediately struck me as smart, cool and quirky. I liked her instantly, but her reaction to me was a bit hard to read. She wasn’t unfriendly, but I sensed a bit of wariness, perhaps even suspicion, directed my way.
After telling Laura how nice it was to meet her, I found myself distracted by a portrait of Adolf Hitler painted entirely in glitter. I moved in to take a closer look and Laura quickly moved on. I didn’t see her again for the rest of the night.
The next day, my friend told me that he’d mentioned to his sister what I do for a living and that her response had been a mixture of shock and moral indignation.
“Don’t you feel sorry for her?” Laura had apparently asked him. “Aren’t you going to try to help her? You’re her friend, aren’t you?”
The words stung, but I wasn’t really surprised. Unfortunately, Laura’s reaction represents how many people continue to view those who work in the adult industry: as damaged human beings, even as victims. I sometimes forget how strange my job can seem to “civilians.” By “civilians,” I mean conventional folks that hold jobs where their coworkers never once get to see them naked. (Not even at the company Christmas party!)
My life, though, hasn’t followed a conventional path: I am a woman, and I am also a pornographer. That is, I write, direct and film lesbian porn (or if you prefer the less heavy handed term: “erotica”) for a company called Girlfriends Films. I occasionally perform in x rated videos, too.
Is it fun? Is it liberating? How do I “really” feel about working in the adult industry? What are the girls like? Are they all on drugs, and do they all hate sex? Are those orgasms real? How much “direction” is required, and how is it done? What really goes into making an x-rated DVD?
This is what you want to know, and it’s what I’m going to tell you each week, right in this space. Why? My motives are twofold. First, I want to introduce you to Girlfriends Films, because our DVDs are filmed by women for women, and very few erotic videos are. Second, I hope that if you read my column on a regular basis it might change the way you think about women and pornography. You may start to view it the way I do: as something fun, creative, even artistic. Something you can enjoy watching without worrying that there’s something wrong with you — or with me. I hope to surprise you, and shed some light on a world that has always existed mainly in shadows. The world you like to visit, and that I call Home.
My hope is, that if you happen to run into me at a party someday, you’ll have a different reaction to me than Laura did. You may warmly shake my hand and smile, and even whisper “You go, girl.” And you might even mean it!
Check this column every week for a peek into the process of creating lesbian porn. I’ll give you a pass to the world of erotic videos created by women and for women (and for men who love women who love each other.) I hope you’ll enjoy my column, and I look forward to your questions and feedback.
Much love,
Sydni Ellis
Director, Writer & Performer
Girlfriends Films
sydniellisxxx@aol.com
GirlfriendsFilms.com
Watch Girlfriends Films now!
